Michelle

Rising 3L @UMichLaw 〽️ & @ucberkeley alum interested in corporate transactions, IP & employment! | 🌈 🇹🇼 whisky, women's soccer & big dog enthusiast

[Michelle @mkung08]

Will be back later to continue my brave & enthusiastic foray into #lawtwitter DMs! I'm a current 1L @ Michigan who would love to gain transactional/corporate exp this summer in SoCal. Also an English major loving her wild Accounting elective—I'm not afraid of learning new things!

[Alexander Large @alexanderlarge_]

Earlier this week, when I asked him for writing advice, Sasha Chapin told me that my core issue is an absurd amount of throat-clearing. He read my newest post and neatly diagnosed a recurring pattern across various creative endeavours, but also life more broadly — the need to self-justify, self-soothe, to hedge, to acknowledge flaws and imperfections, get in there quick and admit that I probably shouldn’t be doing this, that I’m dull, that I’m shit. That is, to live in a space of disempowerment, a quaking fear of taking up space.

Really, the throat-clearing is me reassuring myself that it’s ok for me to be here, and that my experience is real. Really, it��s me desperately hoping to receive this reassurance from others in such a way that it rewires my nervous system and I can finally feel safe.

“Is it ok that I’m here?”.
“Do you approve of me?”.
“If I take up space, will you be bored, disinterested, will you sneer, will you hear me?”.
“Are you going to shoot me down?”.
“I know I’m dumb, I know this idea is stupid”.
“I know I shouldn’t be here”.

In addition to my writing, the throat-clearing energy shows up in the amount that I do, that I share. For example, there’s my digital scrapbook that shows all the thinking I’ve done each day for months. “Look how much I’m doing!” “Look how much I’m trying!” “Am I worthy of love?”.

Sasha hit the nail on the head so cleanly, surfacing a pattern that shows up in every area of my life, and as such, I fear that “stop throat-clearing!” may be easier said than done; I fear that throat-clearing is a fundamental part of my character.

But then, I have learned things that can help, and I know I can change. Let me plant this flag in the ground - soon after this, no more. Let’s have this be the final time I explain myself.

[du @thedulab]

You only self sabotage a relationship when the other person's image of you is too good for your current self image to believe

In an attempt to reconcile the difference, your subconscious will find ways to signal to the other person through poor behaviors that you don't deserve to be seen with such high regard

When this doesn't work and they still see highly of you despite your antics, your subconscious gets confused, in which it attempts to rationalize this confusion by claiming that there must be something wrong with the other person

Now that you've labeled the other person as the problem, your subconscious will then seek to hyper focus on everything they do that could confirm that label to be true

Them urging you to meet your potential is suddenly interpreted as them trying to control you, them doing nice things for you without expectation is suddenly interpreted as them trying to manipulate you

It gets to a point where either you leave or they leave due to exhaustion, and in both scenarios, you claim that they were the enemy that made your life worse

But in reality, you were the one who pushed them away and made their life worse, you were supposed to step up to meet them instead of bringing them down to meet you, and you will continue to repeat the cycle over and over again until you recognize that you were your own worst enemy all along

[COCO @TWOTIMESABITCH]

the best thing a therapist ever told me is “you’re not lazy, you only have a certain amount of energy and right now you’re using it all to survive” and i know someone else needs to hear that too

[Michelle @mkung08]

@zetalyrae Fortunately I was boarding a flight when you tweeted that and read it in one go. Marked it up for myself too. Would love to hear more about how you use Todoist! (Or see via screenshots, as I'm a visual learner.) I bought Pro years ago and still struggle with my organization.

[Michelle @mkung08]

@DrDoyleSays Dr. Glenn, I am so sorry for your loss. I can tell from these photos that you must have packed more than one lifetime of love into the years of her life. Wishing her safe travels to the other side, and peace to your heart.

[Michelle @mkung08]

@Gena_I_Gorlin @jdpeterson Funnily, asking for help with "old" makes sense to me! I was a precocious kid who learned to spell/read with phonics. Vividly remember failing a quiz at 5yo—to my great frustration with English etymology—because I spelled "what" as "hwat" after slowly sounding it out.

[Nate Wolff @proffwolff]

I learn so much from novels. Types of knots, types of boats, types of whales, parts of whales, methods for processing whales, what can be made from whale, shape of whale, what the whale did, the whale's likely motivation, color of said whale, metaphysical ramifications of said co

[Su 🪷 @su_dreams]

Maybe creativity isn't about making something new, but about letting what's already alive in us find its way to the surface.

Like how trees don't force their leaves to grow - they just create the conditions for unfolding.

[Nate Postlethwait @nate_postlethwt]

The thing about complex trauma is it removes you from being the main character in your own life. When you suffer for a prolonged amount of time, survival mode shifts focus on everything external to get by, rather than living peacefully from the center of who you are.

[Hyde 💨 @BreatheLesss]

Signs of aliveness:

No grogginess in the morning
Appetite for [everything]
Naturally attracted to beauty
Low-level flirtatious interactions
Humor (not vulgar irony)
You attract animals
Strong boundaries
Satisfied horniness
Open body language
Sense of ease
Appreciation of nature
Ability to hate bad art, music, prose
Normal levels of disgust response

What else?

[Visakan Veerasamy @visakanv]

You now want to look for connections *between* nodes. Resist the urge to impose some sort of top-down grand scheme. Instead, look for related ideas, riffs, “things that go together”. “Siblings”. Here’s an eg of how I’m doing this retroactively on my blog https://t.co/vioYTlLCql

[Christin @hexprax]

American conservatism just doesn’t appeal to me because I’m not scared of everything.. not scared of immigrants, crime, using public transportation, cities. I’m interested in other people and like talking to them. Even if someone is weird it doesn’t really bother me.

[Michelle @mkung08]

@writeclimbrun @jacopocomin It's funny, ofc I was thinking about this story at my firm's event today! First time you told it, I knew what the partner meant. I think Red tastes like pennies. But generally, and esp as a SA, I keep mum about whisky unless someone signals they want to talk.

[Michelle @mkung08]

we have no choice but to stan (I know my parents must be fuming about this, lol): https://t.co/2sQLqi3jKc

[Michelle @mkung08]

@TiredBambooLaw That works great, since I'll be in NYC for the summer after this weekend. Thanks for offering them! DM sent.

[Michelle @mkung08]

@HayleyReeseChow This is the very concept behind my fave podcasts run by two besties @worstbestseller LOL

[Michelle @mkung08]

@TheGoldenRatio4 Vink is the moon! And the rest of the OG squad the reuinted stars and space between. 🌙✨🌌 Thanks for sharing them all with us, Jen and Ingo, so we get to love them too.

[Michelle @mkung08]

@alyssatcarroll You are brave as hell, and braver today than you were yesterday. You've got this.

[Michelle @mkung08]

within 30 minutes of returning to Twitter after a long hiatus, I am reminded of someone's controversial hot dog take. And boy do I also have a lot of feelings about hot dogs