Work on your EQ. Two underrated skills that will bring you far in life;
1. Learn to give criticism without offending and to take criticism without reacting on impulse. Pause your reaction when you feel triggered, and think about how this criticism can help you grow instead.
Banyak para suami share kes yang serupa, even ada yang masih tanggung semua walaupun tak bekerja.
Saya teringat kisah ibu kita ‘A’isha R.A dia cerita kepada anak buahnya ‘Urwah Ibn Zubair, kata ‘A’isha R.A bahawa kesemua rumah-rumah isteri Nabi ﷺ pernah tidak berasap (tidak memasak) selama 2 bulan !
Kemudian ‘Urwah tanya kepada ‘A’isha R.A apa yang beliau dan isteri-isteri Nabi ﷺ yang lain makan? Jawabnya tamar dan air selama 2 bulan.
Jika kita tanya balik para-para isteri adakah mereka ingin bernikah dengan Nabi ﷺ, mereka akan kata mahu, tapi adakah mereka mampu sabar?
Jika takdir akhirnya mempertemukan kita sebagai jodoh,
maka itu bukan akhir dari menunggu,
melainkan awal dari syukur
yang akan terus hidup sepanjang waktu.
Ash-Shāfi‘ī (رحمه الله) was asked:
“What are the most humiliating traits in a man?”
He replied:
“Excessive speech, spreading secrets, and trusting everyone.”
[Al-Intiqā: 159]
We love to call men "emotionally unavailable" when the reality is that most of them are just psychologically exhausted. A man will spend his entire day navigating a brutal, hyper-competitive world where his margin for error is absolutely zero, just to secure his future. When he finally gets home and just wants 30 minutes of absolute, unbothered silence to let his nervous system decompress, we immediately pathologize him. We call him distant. We say he's pulling away. We demand he instantly switch gears, stimulate our minds, and perform emotional labor the second he walks through the door. We have completely forgotten that men are human beings who run out of battery, not entertainment centers built to cure our boredom. Stop diagnosing a man's absolute exhaustion as a lack of love. Sometimes his silence is just survival
Many people stay stuck because they overthink but never act. Worse, denial and a self-defeating mindset keep them there. Time moves on, and the problem only grows.
Most things are figure-out-able. It doesn’t have to be perfect, just do it and improve as you go.