Msbeartown

Wife, mother, prayer warrior

[J-Diesel @bill_00778]

I thought cool was a temperature till I heard this guy say "hey yo"

[Msbeartown @msbeartown]

My neighbor, Dill hole Von Buttmunch, is an ass

[Msbeartown @msbeartown]

#mynewbook is how to gain weight and lose muscle mass

[Msbeartown @msbeartown]

My supervisor keeps referring to his success, all I can see him doing is sucks ass

[J-Diesel @bill_00778]

#IWantToBeSoRich when sprint offers to save money on my phone bill, I'm all like... why???

[J-Diesel @bill_00778]

#UninspiringTweets if you can't run with the big dogs, you're probably one of those wiener dogs with the short legs

[J-Diesel @bill_00778]

#WhenIRunOutOfStuffToSay I declare "tthat's all folks" and do a bugs bunny tapdance toward the nearest exit

[J-Diesel @bill_00778]

#NewYearSamePersonBecause you can't fix stupid

[J-Diesel @bill_00778]

#UnlikelyClickbait how to gain weight while losing muscle mass

[J-Diesel @bill_00778]

The women only shave their legs from the knees down still wind up prego #ThatsWhyRednecksAreScary

[J-Diesel @bill_00778]

#FirstLineToMyNovel he possessed rather unremarkable features other than the enormous bulge in the back of his khakis

[J-Diesel @bill_00778]

#DrinkAClassicFilm tequill-a-mockingbird

[J-Diesel @bill_00778]

I refer you to the case of rubber versus glue 1977. #ReasonsIllAlwaysBeAKid

[J-Diesel @bill_00778]

When someone says a wordy derd, I will giggle then tell their mother. #ReasonsIllAlwaysBeAKid

[J-Diesel @bill_00778]

#ScareADateIn4Words better update relationship status

[Msbeartown @msbeartown]

Anybody else weirded out by the "you're so cute I'd like to wear you like a suit" commercial? Silence of the Lambs anyone?

[J-Diesel @bill_00778]

#FailedGoFundMe it would be a dream come true, if I could put a lift kit and super swampers on my double wide.

[J-Diesel @bill_00778]

Sorry if you mistook that as a sexual advance. Let's hug it out you big doll. #FailedApologies

[J-Diesel @bill_00778]

Lost my virginity #OnceDuringSex

[J-Diesel @bill_00778]

#ReasonsIDidntCall things got weird after I realized you wanted to be called caitlyn.