Mark

#amwriting #author of novels and flash fiction. #WritingCommunity

[Mark @mumbletoes]

AXL ROSE: *hails big yellow taxi* Take me down to the paradise city where the grass is green-
JONI MITCHELL: *driving* I have some bad news

[dustin Couch @Dustinkcouch]

nasa employee: oh hey u guys are back early

astronaut: moon's haunted

nasa employee: what?

astronaut: *loading a pistol and getting back on the rocket-ship* moon's haunted

[Nicki💗 @AwkwardAndOdd]

I’m at my most productive between the hours of 4am and 8am, so if you ever need help burying a body or baking a cake that’s when to ask

[MumbletoesVSS @mumbletoesVSS]

He put "50 Shades of Grey" aside and nibbled on his wife's thigh. It was lonely being the only survivor of the plane crash.

[Mark @mumbletoes]

Red pandas: *eating bamboo, hoping for some privacy*

My camera roll:

[Mark @mumbletoes]

Chim chiminey, chim chiminey, chim chim cher-ee
The wolves now eat grass and the croc's up a tree
Chim chiminey, chim chiminey, chim chim cher-oo
Oh please won't you help
my bewildering zoo

[Mark @mumbletoes]

Chim chiminey, chim chiminey, chim chim cher-ee
The zebra say woof and the lion says eee
Chim chiminey, chim chiminey, chim chim cher-oo
The dolphins make baa sounds, the peacocks say moo
Oh please won't you help
my bewildering zoo

[Mark @mumbletoes]

I called up the vet and I asked her: 'What? Why?!"
She shrugged and she oinked and she started to fly
I then called a doctor but he was a quack
He eloped with a goose and they're not coming back
Oh please won't you help?
I'm ready to crack

[MumbletoesVSS @mumbletoesVSS]

A waiter approaches your table holding a chunk of sorrow. He begins to grate it over your head.

"Say when," says the waiter.

"Say when," your fellow diners whisper.

"When!" you gasp through your tears.

But the waiter grates on.

[Ron Iver @ronnui_]

Anyone else notice how everyone in Stephen King novels have maine character syndrome?

[Mark @mumbletoes]

Thank you to 'The Casket of Fictional Delights' for publishing my flash fic! 😀

[Rads @_radsy]

Shoot for the moon. If you miss, here's a gentle reminder that the moon's diameter is 3,475km and you could not have fucked this up more

[Mark @mumbletoes]

Thanks to The Casket of Fictional Delights for publishing my flash fiction (and producing an audio version!) 😀

[Sam Sykes @SamSykesSwears]

My fool godson, William, went down to the basement to get a snack four days ago
I told him--every time I tell him--to COUNT the stairs as he goes down. There's only 12. If it goes to 13, come back up and try again. And don't follow the thing singing down there
But does he listen?

[🇨🇦SueCorvette🇨🇦 ❎ @suecorvette]

I’m writing a book about a future hurricane. It’s only a draft at the moment

[eli nova rose @unambivalence]

the two dangers of writing:
- someone will read it
- no one will read it

[Julia May Jonas @Julia_May_Jonas]

Whenever I feel guilty about buying another book, I like to remind myself that I just purchased 1-5 years of that person’s life for 26 dollars.