nameless noob21

video gamer
twitch affiliate
happily engaged to my lovely fiancé @walfrogz

[internet hall of fame @InternetH0F]

Pope Leo XIV has unfortunately just performed the Vatican's first 67

[R A W S A L E R T S @rawsalerts]

🚨#BREAKING: Law enforcement agencies say that thieves stole more than 12 tons of KitKat bars while a shipment was en route across Europe

The company Nestle says the chocolate heist could cause shortages ahead of the upcoming Easter holiday

[🌱pax (HW in progress) @floralGorgon]

how it feels playing cloverpit and getting 5+ items popup in the row

[nameless noob21 @namelessnoob21]

@amooh001 Please.

[✞Righteous Rebellion𓅪 @OneManCircus87]

What happens when you drink 10 oz of Magnesium Citrate?
I’m glad you asked. Buckle up.

12:05 p.m. — It begins. You down the 10-ounce bottle like it’s a lukewarm PBR at a college tailgate. The label says “cherry flavored,” but it tastes like someone described cherry to a chemist who’s never eaten fruit. Regret sets in instantly.

12:06 p.m. — You grab a handful of chips for moral support. They’ll be liquified before they clear your throat, but who cares? Life still feels okay right now. Remember this peace. You’re about to enter the darkest chapter of your gastrointestinal history.

12:37 p.m. — The rumbling starts. There’s movement in the depths. You’ve got five pounds of impacted regret in your colon, and you just drank the “human-safe” version of Drano. You think it’s go time. It’s not. You get one sad little snake turd — a warm-up act.
That’s the last semi-solid you’ll see for the next 24 hours.

12:57 p.m. — The situation escalates. Your stomach is in full revolt. You have 0.3 seconds to make it to the toilet. Running is risky business — one wrong step and you’ll paint the walls. You pray for sphincter strength like never before as you waddle at Mach 3, pants half down, whispering, “Please, God, not like this.”

12:58 p.m. — Impact.
You sit, and the gates of hell open.
The explosion is biblical. It hits the back of the bowl with such violent force it ricochets like a sprinkler system.
You ask yourself, Is that blood?
No — false alarm. Just the ghost of a cherry pie you ate in 2004. The smell is unspeakable. The acoustics? Terrifying. The neighbors think you’re performing an exorcism.

1:06 p.m. – 8:30 p.m. — Time becomes meaningless. You’ve evacuated everything you’ve ever eaten, plus a few ancestral meals for good measure. Your colon feels like it’s been sandblasted with lava. The burn is real. You’re sweating. Crying. Contemplating life. You meet Jesus briefly, but He sends you back — says your mission’s not over yet.

8:37 p.m. — You’re empty. Broken. Reborn.
Your butthole? A war veteran.
Your spirit? In recovery.
You’ll never be the same, but you will survive.

Tomorrow, you’ll rise from the ashes, slip into your last clean pair of underwear, and waddle into Walmart like a survivor of gastrointestinal warfare — to buy a new toilet brush and reclaim your dignity.

You’ve earned it.

Feeling thankful. 💩🙏

[Lukadoosh @Lukadoosh]

the new leave match popup might be a bit much idk

[nameless noob21 @namelessnoob21]

@walfrogz Is that the day you started to crush on me?

[nameless noob21 @namelessnoob21]

@McFrostiie ;(

[nameless noob21 @namelessnoob21]

Just beat eclipse 5 in my engi climb first try let's goooo!
@RiskofRain2

[Stimpee @StimpeeYT]

People keep telling me they're going to shove my figurine up their ass, so here's your chance to do it for free. Retweet + like this post and 3 lucky winners will be picked when it launches May 3rd.

[nameless noob21 @namelessnoob21]

@NaughtyDogWorld My favorite weapon to use is my own stupidity

[nameless noob21 @namelessnoob21]

@TwitchRetweetzz Fingers crossed 🤞

[nameless noob21 @namelessnoob21]

Just completed the next level of my engi eclipse climb same day as the solar eclipse let's go! Time for eclipse 3!#XboxShare #RiskofRain2 @RiskofRain2

[nameless noob21 @namelessnoob21]

Need one of these

[Dexerto @Dexerto]

A company is working on a device that uses AI to release scents matching your gameplay

[Science Simplified @SciSimpAAG]

@gunsnrosesgirl3 Here's slo-mo