O Allah, I seek refuge in you from grief and sadness, from weakness and from laziness, from miserliness and from cowardice, from being overcome by debt and overpowered by men (i.e. others).
You can pretend for a while, but you cannot fake your character forever. Who you are eventually appears under pressure, in unguarded moments and in how you treat people when there is nothing to gain.
The person you perform is rarely even real, only a collection of traits you think others will admire, so you end up becoming a poor imitation of someone who never existed.
Barakah is difficult to see because it does not always appear as increase. Sometimes it is little wealth that remains sufficient, limited time in which much good is completed, knowledge that improves your conduct, family that gives you peace, health spent in obedience, or simply being inexplicably pleased with your portion because the little you lack cannot overwhelm the much Allah has already given you.
Sometimes Allah places barakah in what you possess, and sometimes in the heart receiving it, making you more content, grateful and useful with less than others have with far more.
“What horrifies me most is the idea of being useless: well-educated, brilliantly promising, and fading out into an indifferent middle age.”
― Sylvia Plath
And perhaps every man’s love language is being loved for who he is while being believed in for who he is trying to become.
Men are often valued only when effort becomes achievement, so there is something deeply intimate about a woman who sees the striving before success and whose affection does not disappear when success delays.
She recognises his ambition without making achievement the price of her tenderness.
Alhamdu lil Laahi!
Alhamdu lil Laahi!!
Alhamdu lil Laahil lathi bi ni'imatiHi tatimmus saalihat!
Praises and thanks are for Allah, by whose grace righteous deeds are accomplished.
I think one mentality that quietly ruins marriages is the idea that one person did the other a favour by agreeing to marry them. Two adults chose each other. Both should feel grateful for that choice, and both should come prepared to give 100 percent, not 50 percent while monitoring whether the other person has completed theirs. This does not mean their roles must be identical. It simply means neither person enters the marriage from a position of superiority, as though love, care or commitment is something the other must keep earning.
Qadr does not make effort meaningless. It places effort in its proper rank. You choose, strive, pray and answer for what you intended, yet the result was never yours to command. This protects the heart from two delusions: pride when things work and collapse when they do not. You are responsible for obedience, not sovereign over the outcome.
Hug keh???? My father, as a distinguished guest, was invited to officially declare a football competition open. He went around shaking hands with the players, and I was one of them. That was the first and only handshake I ever knew i had with him.
Wata tsohuwar mai aikin mu inta kira gida. Zakaji tache “kuna lafia” immediately they say “lafia lau” she cuts the call sai ta chire batir sai wanni jumaa🤣🤣