Norma-Jean

Procrastination is my passion 💁‍♀️

[Jamie Bonkiewicz @JamieBonkiewicz]

They’ve arrested more people for touching the peeling paint at the Reflecting Pool than they’ve arrested from the Epstein files.

[Norma-Jean @njarroyo]

@HunterBiden @Bubblebathgirl But Hunter… did you rape children and young women? I didn’t think so… 😉

[Hunter Biden @HunterBiden]

Dear Joe,
I wish I could sit down with you face to face and explain why so many of us were offended by the UFC fight on the South Lawn of the White House.
For me, it had nothing to do with the UFC or who showed up for the fights. The brand you and Dana have built is a bona fide American success story. More power to you. As for the fighters, in my book, anyone brave enough to put it all on the line in the arena is remarkable to witness. Their dedication and discipline inspire me. I don’t understand anyone who can’t admire that.
And as for the people who attended, I, for one, love Shane Gillis. I think he’s hilarious and brilliant. It was a show. A once-in-a-lifetime spectacle. I can’t blame anyone for wanting to witness it firsthand.
My problem is that I believe some of our public spaces are sacred. And unlike many of the great powers that came before us, these American monuments belong to all of us. Not to whoever happens to hold power at the moment.
The White House does not belong to Donald Trump. It does not belong to any President. It belongs to the people. To treat it as Caesar treated the Colosseum is antithetical to everything our founding fathers fought for.
This is not Rome. Presidents are not emperors doling out bread and circuses for the peasants. The White House is the People’s House. This “celebration” could have happened in any stadium within a stone’s throw of the South Lawn. No one would have had an issue with it.
But that was obviously Donald Trump’s whole point. By holding the event on the South Lawn, what he was saying to the rest of us is:
“This is my house. I own it. I will do with it what I please. I’ll build a colosseum and have the gladiators fight under my gaze. I’ll tear down the East Wing. I’ll pave over the Rose Garden. I’ll cover everything in gold and marble. I’ll erase the names of all the men who came before me.”
The fights were an exhibition of imperial domination, not a celebration of our 250th anniversary as a democracy.
The White House is not Buckingham Palace. It is not the Palace of Versailles. It is not the Forbidden City of Beijing. It does not belong to an emperor, or a king, or a commissar.
The White House belongs to us. All of us. The person who sits behind the Resolute Desk in the Oval Office is nothing more than an honored guest. A temporary caretaker.
The President is our servant. Not our Caesar.
Respectfully, Hunter

P.S. Cage match between me and Don Jr.? Your call on the venue. Anywhere but the South Lawn.

[God @TheTweetOfGod]

HE STARTED THE WAR, you stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid motherfucker.

[Norma-Jean @njarroyo]

@ShamsCharania So a guaranteed loss for the Knicks then 💪

[Norma-Jean @njarroyo]

@CP24 The ‘Ninja Slush Machine’ owners thank you 🙏🏼

[Hunter Biden @HunterBiden]

Things most Americans agree on:

Groceries cost too much.

Tariffs suck and make no sense.

Congress and Presidents shouldn’t trade stocks.

The debt is a mess.

The border should be secure, but legal immigration is good.

Endless wars are stupid, especially ones that nobody wants and have never been explained.

Americans are exhausted.

AI is like my new best friend that also might be trying to take my job, my ability to think for myself, and my humanity in the process. Yo like I love you, but WTF, but I still love you.

Diversity is actually awesome! The opposite is boring AF.

Canadians are super fucking cool.

Mexicans are chill.

Putin isn’t a good guy looking out for America’s best interest. Rocky IV and Miracle are great movies.

Good neighbors are a blessing.

Freedom of religion and coexistence without having to blow each other up is probably a good idea.

We all question, are we alone in the universe?

We all fuck up along the way.

Epstein didn’t hang himself.

The Trumps and Epstein were best friends for decades. It’s like Bert trying to tell us Ernie was just an acquaintance in the same social scene on Sesame Street back in the day.

The Cowboys suck. Go Birds!

Things we’re told to fight about:

Me.
Laptop.
Vaccines.
Transgenders in sports.
Pronouns.

That’s the joke.

[Norma-Jean @njarroyo]

@Kristinartz Smart… that is all

[Millennial Moron @Mill_Moron]

Always enjoy the once-a-decade freakout about the census

[Norma-Jean @njarroyo]

God I love this team ❤️

[Toronto Blue Jays @BlueJays]

Grateful for Kazuma and this team 💙

[Covie @covie_93]

All those politicians running for their lives during a shooting finally got to understand how kids in schools feel.

[Art Candee 🍿🥤 @ArtCandee]

We’re supposed to believe someone got through the massive security with a rifle and multiple magazines at the Washington Hilton during the White House Correspondents’ dinner?

[Mark Slapinski @mark_slapinski]

The worst part about the assassination attempt on Donald Trump is the fact that he raped kids with Jeffrey Epstein.

Never forget.

[Mark Slapinski @mark_slapinski]

Nobody is talking about the Epstein files anymore.

And it makes me sick.

[𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕖_𝔾𝕦𝕣𝕝 @SundaeDivine]

Big shoutout to Artemis as they escape Earth while we have to stay and listen to asshole Trump.

[Pierre Poilievre @PierrePoilievre]

No.

The problem is not "Ottawa." Ottawa is a city.

The problem is the "Liberal government," whose present Liberal ministers, Fraser, Miller, and Diab, unleashed this immigration chaos.

To fix a problem, name it.

[Mario Zelaya @mario4thenorth]

🚨 BREAKING

Two pilots are dead.

43 people injured.

Ottawa’s response?

Summon the Air Canada CEO to Parliament because his condolence video wasn’t in French.

These people are a joke.

We are beyond parody.

[Toronto Blue Jays @BlueJays]

✌️ out, Spring!

The boys are coming HOME 🇨🇦

[Norma-Jean @njarroyo]

@PartPhil @TheRealThelmaJ1 I see what you did here 🤣