Noah McCool

please don’t take anything you see here too seriously | Chicago, IL

[Pierre L’Fauex @LFauexProd]

Saw a man's penis at the urinal. @AMCTheatres

[hasanabi @hasanthehun]

just got off the phone with mitch mcconnell. we had phone sex.

[🪩🎲🍒 @expired_grl]

maybe your cat is meowing bc it wants a cigarette

[kev mahserejian @RotoSurgeon]

yep I’ve noticed lately

•Uber there and back: $35
•Shared chicken tenders+fries: $13
•17 tequila sodas: $204

how am I supposed to start a family like this?

[Skurt Vonnegut @ThisLocalHater]

Can't wait to get really old and drive my car into the side of a Dairy Queen

[Noah McCool @noahmccoolguy]

Chicago is the greatest city in the world

[ShibaDad8 @shibadad8]

VIRGINIA VOTERS TODAY

[Noah McCool @noahmccoolguy]

If everyone can afford to have a maid and private chef, who is working as a maid and private chef?..

[The Iced Coffee Hour @TheICHpodcast]

Jason Oppenheim reveals EVERYONE will be able to afford private chefs, maids, the best healthcare in 10 years due to AI👀

“Everyone within 10 to 15 years will have a Michelin star chef, a maid, babysitter, a dentist, and the best physician in the world”

[Noah McCool @noahmccoolguy]

@lettersfromjuno It’s because most people live in car-dependent hell. If you live in a walkable city like Chicago or Boston, you can walk to the bar right after work and enjoy happy hour.

[Noah McCool @noahmccoolguy]

@Reply_wZp Thank you! This is the highest quality version I've found

[Noah McCool @noahmccoolguy]

Apartment hunting in Chicago has been the most torturous experience of my life

[Klara @klara_sjo]

VAPES ARE A DEEP STATE PSYOP DESIGNED TO CONDITION US TO ENJOY SUCKING ROBOT DICKS.

ONCE AI TAKES AWAY ALL OUR JOBS AND THE ONLY THING LEFT FOR HUMANITY IS TO BE SEX SLAVES FOR ROBOTS!!

REAL EYES REALIZE CLANKER LIES!!!!

DON’T FALL FOR IT!!!

WAKE UP SHEEPLE!!!

[Noah McCool @noahmccoolguy]

@thatfrood I TRIED APPLYING FOR THIS SAME PLACE. And I’m trying to move from out of state it’s so stressful

[Miley Official @MileyCyrusBz]

I think we ALL have anniversaries

[litquidity @litcapital]

We need a ‘Silicon Valley’ reboot ASAP. This is absolute cinema

[the giant @chaser_bait]

[future historian]: and that’s why we have to mime most of our lithium from the garbage dumps of the past

[guy on the tour]: wow ha it’s crazy they used lithium like this back then, that they didn’t know how valuable it was

[historian]: oh no they knew they just preferred vapes

[mrpancake4343 @mrpancake4343]

THEYRE LYING ABOUT THE SNOW STORM BEING BAD TO MOVE NUCLEAR WEAPONS ON THE HIGHWAYS. DRIVE ON THE HIGHWAYS!

[Noah McCool @noahmccoolguy]

The greatest mistake apple has ever made. They just ruined the readability of their entire user interface for a party trick

[💾 @jvepng]

Apple Music with and without Liquid Glass

[monty 🦷 @moncuries]

my complaint ab heated rivalry ep3 is those smoothies look watery as fuck

[Dispropaganda @Dispropoganda]

Trump after having one conversation with Mamdani