Rudeus and Sylphy carry grief, love, fear, helplessness, and responsibility. Reducing them to labels like "cheater" or "insensitive" is disrespectful to everything they've experienced and the people they are beyond these circumstances, which are themselves really painful and difficult to put into words.
I think our attempt to understand them should come through empathy and in light of their circumstances, but I don't think that our understanding should end with explaining why Rudeus acted as he did.
I would want there to be a way back towards goodness and love 🤔 but Rudeus does have people who love him. He has Sylphy, who stays beside him and tries to carry him through his suffering. He has family. He has people who care about what happens to him.
So I thought for some time: Is he truly abandoned to his pain?
What seems harder to give him is something much less tangible: the feeling that his actions can actually change what has happened. That sense of helplessness, of having lost something that cannot be recovered no matter how desperately you wish for it.
And I can imagine how that kind of helplessness could break someone.
But I don't think that makes his worst choices inevitable, nor does it make them something we should simply accept. If anything, it would make his eventual recovery all the more meaningful.
In that sense, I'm left with the thought that the hardest part of healing for Rudeus isn't finding someone who loves him. It is being able to believe that their love still matters.
Not necessarily as a cure for suffering, and not because another person is responsible for saving you, but because... love still matters, even when it cannot undo what has been lost. And that makes it worth holding onto.
And maybe that's what hurts me the most.
The hope that he doesn't abandon goodness.
That even after what he does, or was driven to do, he learns to repent, to love, and to hold on to the people who chose to remain beside him.
Criticar a Rudeus y a Sylphy es muy fácil. Señalarlos, juzgarlos, reducirlos a etiquetas cómodas como «borracho» o «insensible» es sencillo cuando se mira desde fuera, cuando no se ha cargado con lo que ellos cargan, cuando no se ha amado como ellos aman. Pero entenderlos, eso ya es otra cosa. Eso requiere detenerse, mirar más allá de lo evidente y preguntarse qué hay detrás de cada error, de cada silencio, de cada intento torpe por hacer lo correcto.
Porque no se trata solo de perder a alguien. Se trata de perder a la persona que te sacó del aislamiento social, la que te mostró el mundo, la que te enseñó parte de todo lo que sabe, la que se convirtió en tu esposa y en la madre de tus hijos. Perder eso no es perder a una persona. Es perder el suelo, la dirección, el sentido. Es quedarte sin el mapa que te ayudaba a orientarte en la vida.
Y encima, ya había pasado antes. Ya había perdido a Paul. Ya había pasado por ese dolor de no poder hacer nada, de ver cómo alguien se apaga y tú no puedes detenerlo. Y ahora, otra vez. Otra vez el mismo miedo, otra vez la misma impotencia, otra vez esa sensación de que la vida te arrebata lo que más quieres y tú solo puedes mirar.
Entonces, ¿qué hace Sylphy? Lo que hace alguien que ama de verdad: intenta cargar con todo. Intenta sostener a su esposo, intenta salvarlo, intenta ser fuerte por los dos, intenta que no se hunda porque si él se hunde, ella siente que se hunde todo. Y lo hace como puede, como sabe, incluso si se equivoca. Porque cuando quieres salvar a alguien de una depresión de ese nivel, no hay manual. No hay una forma correcta de hacerlo. Solo hay intentos, a veces torpes, a veces equivocados, pero intentos al fin y al cabo.
Y llamarla insensible por eso es injusto. Es profundamente injusto. Porque la insensibilidad sería mirar hacia otro lado, sería dejarlo solo, sería rendirse. Y ella no hace eso. Ella se queda. Ella lucha. Ella intenta. Aunque no sepa cómo. Aunque a veces lo haga mal. Aunque se equivoque. Eso no es insensibilidad, eso es amor en su forma más cruda y más humana. Es amor que no sabe muy bien qué hacer pero que no se va.
Y él no es solo un ebrio borracho. Es alguien que está roto. Es alguien que está cargando con un dolor que no sabe cómo sostener, que no sabe cómo nombrar, que no sabe cómo soltar. Y a veces, cuando el dolor es demasiado grande, uno busca formas de apagarlo, aunque sean destructivas. No porque sea malo, sino porque está hundido. No porque no ame, sino porque no puede con todo.
Y Sylphy no es una insensible. Es alguien que está intentando salvar a la persona que ama de un abismo que no entiende del todo, pero que ve. Y ver a alguien que amas hundirse y no poder sacarlo de ahí es una de las cosas más dolorosas que existen. Porque amas, porque quieres, porque darías lo que fuera, pero no depende de ti. Y eso te rompe.
Los dos están rotos. Los dos están luchando. Los dos están haciendo lo que pueden con lo que tienen. Y quizás ahí está lo trágico y lo hermoso de esta historia: en que ninguno es el malo, en que los dos están sufriendo, en que los dos se equivocan intentando hacer lo correcto. Y eso, aunque duela, es profundamente humano.
Rudeus and Sylphy carry grief, love, fear, helplessness, and responsibility. Reducing them to labels like "cheater" or "insensitive" is disrespectful to everything they've experienced and the people they are beyond these circumstances, which are themselves really painful and difficult to put into words.
I think our attempt to understand them should come through empathy and in light of their circumstances, but I don't think that our understanding should end with explaining why Rudeus acted as he did.
I would want there to be a way back towards goodness and love 🤔 but Rudeus does have people who love him. He has Sylphy, who stays beside him and tries to carry him through his suffering. He has family. He has people who care about what happens to him.
So I thought for some time: Is he truly abandoned to his pain?
What seems harder to give him is something much less tangible: the feeling that his actions can actually change what has happened. That sense of helplessness, of having lost something that cannot be recovered no matter how desperately you wish for it.
And I can imagine how that kind of helplessness could break someone.
But I don't think that makes his worst choices inevitable, nor does it make them something we should simply accept. If anything, it would make his eventual recovery all the more meaningful.
In that sense, I'm left with the thought that the hardest part of healing for Rudeus isn't finding someone who loves him. It is being able to believe that their love still matters.
Not necessarily as a cure for suffering, and not because another person is responsible for saving you, but because... love still matters, even when it cannot undo what has been lost. And that makes it worth holding onto.
And maybe that's what hurts me the most.
The hope that he doesn't abandon goodness.
That even after what he does, or was driven to do, he learns to repent, to love, and to hold on to the people who chose to remain beside him.
Rudeus and Sylphy carry grief, love, fear, helplessness, and responsibility. Reducing them to labels like "cheater" or "insensitive" is disrespectful to everything they've experienced and the people they are beyond these circumstances, which are themselves really painful and difficult to put into words.
I think our attempt to understand them should come through empathy and in light of their circumstances, but I don't think that our understanding should end with explaining why Rudeus acted as he did.
I would want there to be a way back towards goodness and love 🤔 but Rudeus does have people who love him. He has Sylphy, who stays beside him and tries to carry him through his suffering. He has family. He has people who care about what happens to him.
So I thought for some time: Is he truly abandoned to his pain?
What seems harder to give him is something much less tangible: the feeling that his actions can actually change what has happened. That sense of helplessness, of having lost something that cannot be recovered no matter how desperately you wish for it.
And I can imagine how that kind of helplessness could break someone.
But I don't think that makes his worst choices inevitable, nor does it make them something we should simply accept. If anything, it would make his eventual recovery all the more meaningful.
In that sense, I'm left with the thought that the hardest part of healing for Rudeus isn't finding someone who loves him. It is being able to believe that their love still matters.
Not necessarily as a cure for suffering, and not because another person is responsible for saving you, but because... love still matters, even when it cannot undo what has been lost. And that makes it worth holding onto.
And maybe that's what hurts me the most.
The hope that he doesn't abandon goodness.
That even after what he does, or was driven to do, he learns to repent, to love, and to hold on to the people who chose to remain beside him.
@g38ssc Sorry If it came across as disrespectful, I just wanted to highlight the need for a clearer reasoning while comparing very different things
I do understand the significance of the recent MT episode, though I think It's usefulness compared to RBD is quite different
@g38ssc Sorry If it came across as disrespectful, I just wanted to highlight the need for a clearer reasoning while comparing very different things
I do understand the significance of the recent MT episode, though I think It's usefulness compared to RBD is quite different
@g38ssc Sorry If it came across as disrespectful, I just wanted to highlight the need for a clearer reasoning while comparing very different things
I do understand the significance of the recent MT episode, though I think It's usefulness compared to RBD is quite different
@MoviesWorl94967 I get you, but I think comparison is fine for very different things, as long as there's a little more reasoning so people don't misunderstand
Subaru loves his parents, he respects them the most and is grateful for their support.
But he's also Emilia's knight, Beatrice's spirit partner, Rem's hero, and a close companion to many others in the fantasy world.
I'd still feel really sad even if he gets to have a heartfelt talk and a goodbye to his Mother and Father.
After all this time apart, I just want them all to live together, or at least stay connected. I hope this becomes true.
Like, imagine Emilia getting to meet Subaru's parents, or have Subaru's parents a kind of father and mother figure in her life, or imagine Subaru being able to spend lot more time expressing his thoughts and love towards his parents ✨ Don't tell me it's unrealistic, I want all of them to stay connected!!!
He probably wouldn't do it, because
While there is no rule saying Subaru has to suffer through torture before dying, and Hypothetically, Subaru could use an instant-kill method to trigger RBD,
The pain and the feeling of being terrified of death is not meaningless.
In this sense, using RBD as a tool would affect his fear of death, which isn't necessarily good.
He also needs to know that the situation is actually hopeless. If there's even a small possibility of escape, dying would just waste his current attempt.
And Subaru often cannot decide this immediately, because he doesn't always know whether a situation is truly hopeless or if he can somehow get through it.
And even if he does realise the situation is hopeless, he doesn't necessarily know where the checkpoint is, right?
He could be risking a completely different checkpoint, and I don't think Subaru would consciously gamble his current attempt on an uncertain outcome, rather than simply having RBD activate on it's own.
But maybe there's a smarter way, or scenarios that I missed 🤔 what do you think?
Ngl, Subaru is dumb cus if I was him I would be using rbd like a cheat and off myself the minute something goes wrong.
He should have spent a loop to learn how to kill himself painlessly like using the unseen hand to crush his own heart.