Occupy Pitchbot

RT IF THIS SOUNDS TRUE

[Occupy Pitchbot @occupypitchbot]

PRESIDENT BIDEN IS CONSIDERING A WINDFALL TAX FOR OIL COMPANIES' PROFITING OFF OF THE AMERICAN PEOPLE. RT IF BRANDON NEEDS TO TAX THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF THESE OIL TYCOONS'.

[Occupy Pitchbot @occupypitchbot]

BREAKING: Ted Cruz greeted in Yankee Stadium with a sea of middle fingers RT IF YOU ALSO THINK ZODIAC SHOULD GO FUCK HIMSELF.

[Occupy Pitchbot @occupypitchbot]

BREAKING: JANUARY 6 COMMITTEE SHOWED FOOTAGE OF NANCY PELOSI SAYING SHE WOULD PUNCH TRUMP OUT IF HE CAME DOWN TO THE CAPITOL AND THAT 'I'M GOING TO JAIL AND I'M GOING TO BE HAPPY'. RT IF YOU'D HAPPILY GO TO JAIL WITH HER. #LOCKUSUP

[Occupy Pitchbot @occupypitchbot]

HUNTER’S DAD CALLED TO SAY “I LOVE YOU” WHEN HE WAS STRUGGLING.

IVANKA’S DAD SAID HE WOULD F*** HER IF SHE WASNT HIS DAUGHTER.

RT IF YOU’D RATHER HAVE HUNTER’S DAD.

[Occupy Pitchbot @occupypitchbot]

BREAKING: TRUMP HAS BEEN FLAILING SINCE THE FEDS CAUGHT HIM STEALING STATE SECRETS. RT IF YOU THINK THERE'S MORE HIDING IN THE TOILETS AT BEDMINSTER 🧻🧻🧻 #PAPERTRAIL

[Occupy Pitchbot @occupypitchbot]

BREAKING: SCRANTON JOE TOLD GOVERNOR DEATH-SANTIS TO GO EAT A BUG DURING A VISIT TO SOUTHWEST FLORIDA. RT IF YOU THINK JOE SHOULD HAVE PANTSED HIM!

[Occupy Pitchbot @occupypitchbot]

BREAKING: Herschel Walker accuses The Left™️ of making him pay for his ex's abortion and handwriting a weird "get well soon from your abortion" greeting card. RT IF YOU THINK HE ACTUALLY LOVES HIS SON

[Occupy Pitchbot @occupypitchbot]

RT IF YOU'RE GLAD THAT FETUS DIDNT HAVE TO GROW UP WITH HERSCHEL WALKER AS ITS DAD!

[Occupy Pitchbot @occupypitchbot]

RT IF YOU’VE NEVER BEEN RAIDED BY THE FBI 🚨

[Occupy Pitchbot @occupypitchbot]

WHILE AT CPAC, MARJORIE TAYLOR GREENE HELD A FAKE VIGIL IN A FAKE JAIL CELL WITH A J6 RIOTER THAT SNITCHED ON HIS FRIENDS AND WAS GIVEN NO JAIL TIME. RT IF MTG SHOULD GET USED TO THE BARS.

[Occupy Pitchbot @occupypitchbot]

SUSAN COLLINS SAYS THAT REPUBLICANS MIGHT NOT VOTE FOR SAME-SEX MARRIAGE BECAUSE DEMOCRATS ARE PASSING AN INFLATION BILL.

RT IF YOU WANT SOME OF WHAT SHE'S SMOKING.

[Acyn @Acyn]

Stewart: Senate is where accountability goes to die. They’re never losing their jobs. Pat Toomey didn’t lose his job, he’s walking away. God knows what pot of gold he’s stepping into to lobby this government to shit on more people

[Amanda Terkel @aterkel]

Susan Collins tells @JNicholsonInDC that same-sex marriage bill may be doomed now bc of what Dems did on the inflation reduction bill https://t.co/ndnTOLxbEt

[NYTPitchbot @DougJBalloon]

The Choco Taco is on the ballot this November.

[Occupy Pitchbot @occupypitchbot]

AFTER ANNOUNCING HIS NEW THIRD PARTY, FORMER PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE ANDREW YANG NOTED THAT MOST THIRD PARTIES FAIL DUE TO SUBSTANDARD VIBES. RT IF THAT SOUNDS TRUE.

[Occupy Pitchbot @occupypitchbot]

JOE MANCHIN HAS TESTED POSITIVE FOR COVID-19 AND WILL CONTINUE DISTANCING FROM HIS CONSTITUENTS AND THEIR NEEDS FOR THE FORESEEABLE FUTURE. RT IF YOUR STATE IS ON FIRE.

[Occupy Pitchbot @occupypitchbot]

BREAKING: THE SECRET SERVICE HAS NO TEXTS FROM JAN. 5 OR 6, 2021 TO HAND OVER TO THE J6 COMMITTEE. THE TEXTS ARE GONE.

RT IF YOU THINK THE ARCHIVES SHOULD LOCK AGENTS UP IN THE WATERGATE EXHIBIT UNTIL THEY FIND THE LOST TEXTS.

[Occupy Pitchbot @occupypitchbot]

TRUMP TELLS TEAM HE NEEDS TO BE PRESIDENT AGAIN TO SAVE HIMSELF FROM CRIMINAL PROBES. RT IF YOU THINK THAT SOUNDS TRUE.

[Occupy Pitchbot @occupypitchbot]

TED CRUZ SAYS THAT THE OBERGEFELL DECISION TO LEGALIZE SAME-SEX MARRIAGE WAS "CLEARLY WRONG WHEN IT WAS DECIDED". RT IF YOU THINK CRUZ'S DECISION TO PAPIER-MÂCHÉ HIS PUBIC HAIR TO HIS FACE WAS CLEARLY WRONG AS WELL 💈🥜🧔🏽

[Occupy Pitchbot @occupypitchbot]

FMR OVERSTOCK CEO PATRICK BYRNE, AN ALLY OF TRUMP, TESTIFIED BEHIND CLOSED DOORS BEFORE THE JANUARY 6 COMMITTEE, FOR NEARLY EIGHT HOURS FRIDAY. RT IF YOU THINK TRUMP'S ONLY FRIEND, MIKE PILLOW IS NEXT 🔥🛌🏽🔥