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[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

we got me losing my virginity before gta 6

[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

it's nice that nasa provides lodging for their astronauts. like imagine how annoying it would be if you got to space and you were like great, now i gotta find a cheap hotel somewhere

[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

are there amateur astronauts? like what if one day steve and his buddies put a rocketship together and they were like "we're headed to venus" and they actually pulled it off and got there

[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

everybody talks about stockholm syndrome like its this terrible thing but i've had it for a while now and i'm actually starting to enjoy it

[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

if you got a frog to take photos would it be a frogtographer or a photografrog? phofrographer? frogfrografrog?

[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

this guy tries to make kojima look bad and then describes one of the coolest characters ever

[John A. Douglas @J0hnADouglas]

Whenever someone glazes Hideo Kojima, remember he once made a boss character that’s a lardass in a bomb disposal suit riding around on rollerblades and sipping wine from a wine glass with a straw.

His name? Fat Man.

“Genius”

[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

i'm getting my autopsy done this weekend. they give you a discount if you do it before you die

[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

anytime a critically acclaimed director makes a bad movie you have to preface your criticism with "i'm glad this movie exists but..."

[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

@impression_ists I'd be cool if you posted the years these works were painted

[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

jocktopus: "hey bro, wanna see me shotgun eight beers at the same time?"

[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

and i thought the year of luigi ended in 2014. baby, it's just getting started

[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

when i'm looking through the free jazz section at the record store and all of the albums have price tags on them

[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

westside gumm adlibs be like chew chew chew chew chewwwww

[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

do you think fish skateboard videos use a human eye lens

[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

MF DUNE be like "met a snack, jet a fast track to arrakis, nice spice iced to your psyche like a crack hit"

[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

if i'm being trans parent i'm part of the queer community. if i'm transparent i'm part of the clear community

[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

(nas voice) i never fart, cus fart is the cousin of poop

[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

i just read sinbad the sailor. they should have called it singood (hold for applause)

[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

they try to make me look bad by digging up old shit like its some kind of snarkeological dig

[🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠 @ocelotisonline]

i'm gonna put together a musical supergroup called hall, oates, simon, garfunkel, peter, paul, mary, crosby, nash, stills, young, hootie, and the blowfish