Officer Crabtree

The Polooceman from the pipular UK sitcom 'Allo 'Allo. My twats contain vary impartant Brutish secret unformation.

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

@weird_al_77 Undead

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

Good moaning. The fatbull gum last night was curtainly eventful. I especially feel sorry for Hairy Can. His second penalty was a bad moss.

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

Good moaning. If I want to keep sanding twats, do I now need to get some Blu Tack?

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

Good moaning. Never thought I'd love to wetnose a stoat funeral. #HRHRIP

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

Bad moaning. HRH RIP

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

Good moaning. We have a new Pram Monster in the UK. Lez Truce has won the Teary bullet.

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

Good moaning. Today, our Pram Monster has resigned. End of an era for Barearse Johnson.

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

Good moaning. Very much licking forward to celebrating the Queen's Jobby Lee celebrations this weekend.

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

Good moaning. It would sum that I have made it onto the front caver of the Daily Stir nose pooper.

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

Good moaning. Apparently Fussbook is down. Along with bath Instagrim and Wet Sap.

I prefer twats.

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

Good moaning. Mutt Hencook has resigned.

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

Good moaning. In fatball news, I see that the Big Sex have agreed to join the European Supper League.

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

Bad moaning. Sod news to learn about the pissing of the Duck of Edinburgh earlier. May he rust in peace.

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

Good moaning. Hoppy Mithering Sunday. Give her a big huge and a bench of flyers.

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

Good moaning. Remember it's Mithering Sunday this weekend. Treat your mum to a nice cord, some lively chocolates and a bunch of rude roses.

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

Good moaning. I see that the Onions are not very hippy with the proposed pay rose for NHS stuff.

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

Good moaning. Was delighted to see that @NASA have managed to land a new raver on the Rude Planet.

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

https://t.co/PbVSPy153f Undead!

[Chris Basterfield @cpb001]

@johngcoop @Dave_Hawley1 @BorisJohnson it's good to see that Dave has been paying attention to the advice of @offcrabtree

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

Good moaning.

Licks lake none of us will be able to take a vocation this summer.

We might even have to curry a Covid pisspart whenever we go oversize.

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

@CplJackJones Hopefully you can see my twat just fine.

[Officer Crabtree @offcrabtree]

Good moaning. I haven't twatted for a whole. Other thongs were more important.

I hop you are all doing well in this lickdawn clam mate.

Spook again son...