If you ever doubt how magical this world is, one day you will decide to go to a World Cup watch party in Oakland that you found online to root for a country where you spent two years trying to coax English out of the mouths of Cape Verdean teenagers. 1/7
It’s late September.
Arsenal head to St. James’ Park on the back of a nightmare run against Newcastle, having lost home and away in the Carabao Cup semi-final the season before. A must-win if we’re serious title contenders.
34th minute: Nick Woltemade rises highest and heads home Sandro Tonali’s cross. Newcastle lead 1-0.
Social media meltdown. Rivals rejoice. Arsenal fans agonise.
Then off the bench comes Mikel Merino.
A sublime header to level it. Arsenal go on to win.
The word on the street? That comeback, after going 1-0 down in the 34th minute, was the moment we won the Premier League.
But why 34?
Because while the 34th minute brought panic that day, today marks our 34th day of celebrating, exactly 34 days since Arsenal won the premier league title.
Feels like time to call it a day on this account, so this will be my final post.
I started this piss-taking Celebration Police thing 4 years ago and it’s genuinely been great fun. Unexpectedly so.
Through this account, I’ve met and engaged with some brilliant people, built a 55k following, made a bit of money and, for the most part, enjoyed my time here.
But let’s be honest: the joke wore thin a long time ago. And i’m bored of this platform and the increasingly repetitive, shit banter that fills it.
And Arsenal have won the league, so who gives a fuck about weirdos telling you when you can or can’t be happy about the football team you invest so much of yourself in😂
Policing celebrations is about as lame as it gets. It really is😂���🏻
So thank you for all the support over the years, each and every one of you, and for engaging with The Celebration Police. You’ve been brilliant❤️
So for one last time…
ALL UNITS TO THE EMIRATES!!! 🚨🚨🚨
Chiefo x
#COYG
The Metropolitan Police have confirmed the Arsenal parade today is the largest football parade ever held in England, with an estimated 1.5million people in attendance. 🤯❤️🔥 [@AFCAMDEN]
An unbelievable season which didn’t end in the way we all dreamed of. That doesn’t change the fact we are still champions of England!
Looking forward to celebrating that with the thousands of fans tomorrow in North London!
Thank you for all the support this season ❤️