rizztopher

my belly is full of beans and my mind is full of dreams xoxo

[Manic Brainbow @BrainbowManic]

@AG_knocks @veryharryhill You're welcome

[Eshita @eshita]

@veryharryhill Why didn’t they just yassify everyone in the Epstein files

[Harry Hill @veryharryhill]

Yassified my friend’s baby to maintain anonymity and then yassified myself because I felt busted next to him

[Santa Gerald Robotnik @FrankJo1576400]

@PeterTwinklage What if Kirk faked his death to live his dream of being a kawaii anime lover

[Peter Twinklage @PeterTwinklage]

Kirkified to maintain anonymity

[uke creature🇵🇸🚩 @UkeCreature]

when you slip a little in the shower and you know you died in your original reality but the quantum immortality kicked in so it's chill

[DT @1884DT]

This is proper noughties World Cup fare. Old school tartery. None of this click my links woke nonsense.

[Liz Lemonade @frankiecass2]

@Baaulp Dark ages peasants would have far more dignity that whatever this is

[ganii @gahhnie]

the chinese are puffing shit i couldnt even fathom

[Andrew Torba @BasedTorba]

If you used Google products to organize a revolution today the feds would be at your door within five minutes.

[Chowder 🐺 @imbrownonline]

morning wood isnt real i hit every house overnight like santa and jerk people off 90% to completion

[Nikolaj🇺🇦🇵🇸 @nikicaga]

Argentina, famous fans of England

[rizztopher @opeopeoka]

i love twitter because ill be giggling away at something and my girlfriend looks over to see whats funny and its the dumbest shit shes ever seen till the next time im giggling away

[Jontanium-bluesky (Adopts and comms available) @Jontanium]

I thought they were grilling up bobby hill

[Emceey @lightworld001]

@OvOBrezzzy Failing in a losing contest is whole nother level of a loser

[𝗕𝗿𝗲𝗲𝘇𝘆’🦉 @OvOBrezzzy]

I fear she ate you up with this 😭😭

[Lucius Winslow @Lucius_Winslow]

1346: longbows
1356: rear attack
1415: longbows
1495: plague, a pope, and supply lines
1525: their own stupidity
1672: flood the dykes
1704: two military geniuses
1805: one-eyed genius
1812: a Russian winter
1815: infantry squares and a stiff upper lip
1954: take the high ground

[Liberite 🇬🇧 🇪🇺 @brownliberite]

In Britain, there is an ancient power the PM has which allows for anything to happen no questions asked but it's just used to increase tuition fees periodically and let pubs stay open during world cups

[Chase Passive Income @chasedownleads]

Donald Trump didn't make his first billion in crypto until age 80

Relax, you still have time

[❥ 𝑪𝒐𝒇𝒇𝒆𝒆 𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑭𝒂𝒏𝒔 ❥ @tonyhawktruther]

Gardeners will be like “We need to attract as many butterflies as possible. Ok next it’s time to destroy my #1 enemy which is caterpillars”