Pablo Avion

Laugh like no one is dancing.™ This is my new comedy profile. I should probably put comedy in quotes.

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

I wish we had more "bad boys" of cooking. Because I feel the 7 or 8 we have now just aren't enough.

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

Falling off a cliff as I type this. No big deal.

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

The scariest story ever told

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

Remember that time the whole country got #gaslighted by #DonaldTrump? That was fun.

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

Please vote YES on Prop Eleventy-Eight!!

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

Then he said, "Can a cream make you gay? Because it made Ben Gay."

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

Nostradamus said, "In 2016, a Prince will fall. A Bow will be unleashed into the ether. And a Gene will become wild."

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

I just took the "What Kind of Narcissist Am I?" quiz, and came up "Self-Obsessed Quiz-Taker!" What kind will you be??

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

I think my gingivitis just joined forces with my tendinitis, and now I'm in big trouble.

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

You've really got to try the cows' eyes.

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

Might go out and get some Wiccan food this weekend.

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

I've been kissing mannequins lately, but it's not because I'm into it; I'm just trying to get a dialogue started.

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

My favorite part of Michael Jackson's beat it is when he sings, throw the hot pocket into the fire.

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

90% of water is fish saliva. Google it.

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

I've really gotten into washing my body lately.

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

Won't someone TAKE A STAND and pay for my vacation??

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

Just made a wig out of candy corn.

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

ALL DISHWASHING LIQUID FOUND TO BE CARCINOGENIC - Report Released Today!!! would be an extremely alarming headline.

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

Big horny boobs?? Add! Add! ADD!!!!!

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

According to Tahitian legend, a tourist once saw the invoice, and his tears became the sea.

[Pablo Avion @pabloavion]

What's worse? Being a mass murderer, or someone who brings a radio to the beach?