Parker

[Parker @parkergarrity]

@theofficialza Recorded at varying altitudes and with different salinities of water so that listeners have no idea how long that day’s episode will be

[Qasim Rashid, Esq. @QasimRashid]

Worker: I can't live on $7.25/hr

GOP: So go to college

W: I can't afford $100K tuition

GOP: Take out loans

W: I can't afford to pay these at 8% interest

GOP: No one forced you to go to college

W: But you just said—

Billionaire: I NEED MORE MONEY!

GOP: Here's a $2T Tax Cut

[yam haus @yamhaus]

10 am-12 pm bottomless mimosas
12:30pm Oppenheimer
4-6pm ungodly amount of Olive Garden unlimited breadsticks, 4 bottles of red wine, and shrimp alfredo
7pm Barbie
10 pm- 2 am existential reflection and discussion with the boys over beers

[MeidasTouch @MeidasTouch]

Trump brags to Bret Baier about granting Alice Johnson clemency.

Baier informs him that she would be killed under his policy proposal of executing drug dealers.

Trump is caught off guard: "No, no. No. Under my pl–. Under that? UHHHHHHHHHHH..."

[Jay Black @hellojayblack]

Bret Baier just got Trump to admit that he ordered the Code Red on Private Santiago.

[Parker @parkergarrity]

@TurnerG23 LVSAB

[Ben Wexler @mrbenwexler]

We’ve had 46 U.S. Presidents, and they’ve been indicted on a total of 71 felony counts. Here’s how it breaks down:

1-44: 0
45: 71
46: 0

[Charlotte Clymer 🇺🇦 @cmclymer]

Sweetie, several things:

1. The U.S. Flag Code is advisory, not mandatory. You cannot be "in breach" of it.

2. This display is still aligned with the Flag Code due to the flag you cropped out flying above it.

3. The President can alter the Flag Code (§ 10).

Take a nap.

[chris evans @notcapnamerica]

Disney has pulled the plug on a 1 billion dollar development in Florida that would’ve created more than 2,000 jobs with $120,000 as the average salary. https://t.co/BaZZolq65I

[Parker @parkergarrity]

This man is ruining my home.

[Ron Filipkowski @RonFilipkowski]

Desantis today says if students want to study “niche majors” they can go to schools like Berkeley, but FL colleges are now going to solely focus on “the basics.”

[Jamal Simmons @JamalSimmons]

So let me get this straight: jobs are up, inflation is down, manufacturing investment is up and unemployment is down. Dems defied political history in 2022 and he’s waging a fight for the soul of our democracy but y’all still don’t know about @JoeBiden ?

[Nina Turner @ninaturner]

💁🏾‍♀️

[FSU Plays Daily @FSUplays]

Florida State Head Coach Mike Norvell with a 400+ yard drive to set up a tap in eagle putt. Impressive.

[Tim Hogan @timjhogan]

oh my god

[Jeff Jackson @JeffJacksonNC]

I told you that the angriest voices in Congress are mostly faking - that they’re just auditioning for certain news shows.

Then Newsmax decided to prove my point.

Watch:

[Elijah Manley @iElijahManley]

I’m fucking angry. My Governor is in NH today. He’s traveled to three states since the flooding and only came back to Florida to sign the abortion ban and hauled ass back out of state to campaign for president. No stop in Fort Lauderdale. A fucking disgrace.

[Cloudy 🌥️ @oncIoud_e]

feel free to remind yourself of these images if the propaganda today is getting to be too much for you

[Greg Greene @ggreeneva]

Things that did _not_ kill kids today:

- a renaissance sculpture
- a film about Ruby Bridges
- drag queen story time
- the word ‘tampon’
- critical race theory
- woke banks
- saying that Rosa Parks was Black
- gender-affirming care
- ‘The Bluest Eye’

What did:

-an AR-f––ing-15

[David Hogg 🟧 @davidhogg111]

Senator Blackburn took $1.25 million from the NRA.