Patrick Donnelly

I. am. Job.

[Patrick Donnelly @PatchDonnelly]

@JetBlue just a quick question - is it standard practice for your flight attendants to ask a customer (who doesn’t need one)in front of everyone as they’re boarding “sir, are going to be comfortable with the normal seatbelt or would they like an extender today?”

[Patrick Donnelly @PatchDonnelly]

⁦@Yahoo⁩ ⁦@YahooEnt⁩ you guys make so many proofreading mistakes but COME ON. You can’t evenget the name of the comic strip right? How many people read this and said, “yeah that looks good!”

[madi diaz @madidiaz]

Truly devastated by the damage done by @Delta to my 20 year old martin guitar. So many memories just gone. Absolutely beyond devastated. Please repost. @Delta needs to be held responsible.

[Patrick Donnelly @PatchDonnelly]

@TheEqualizerCBS I’ve never done this but-extremely obvious there’s not a single native New Yorker working on your show. 53rd & Lex is the squeakiest clean stop. NO ONE HAS EVER SAID “he grew up in the Kitchen” & gotten a knowing smile with, “ah Hell’s Kitchen?” @IAMQUEENLATIFAH

[Patrick Donnelly @PatchDonnelly]

Watching the premiere of @AbbottElemABC & wondering if anyone remembers when @JeanneAllen tried to school #quintabrunson about Charters but EPICALLY failed.

Just like @JeanneAllen‘s students.

[Patrick Donnelly @PatchDonnelly]

@RealSkipBayless @undisputed Tell me you’re insecure about your relevance w/out telling me.

Can’t have it both ways. If you’re about the sports, ignore her & talk about their defense, their offense, their strategies, what they did well, how they effed up.

If it’s pop culture talk about her.

Which is it?

[Patrick Donnelly @PatchDonnelly]

@HoeffnerJoe Was gonna tweet the link to this article to highlight how you truly had it out for him for no reason - bc the attention is again on the white folk (per The Help)… but you truly went ahead & outdid yourself w/how your biggest concern is that you misspelled his character’s name

[Patrick Donnelly @PatchDonnelly]

@AirCanada I’ve been trying to call you (admittedly on off hours) for a customer service question regarding my upcoming flight for just about two weeks now. And everytime I’m on hold for over an hour and then the cal drops.

Please help

[Patrick Donnelly @PatchDonnelly]

@Caitlyn_Jenner You are definitely the problem

[Patrick Donnelly @PatchDonnelly]

⁦@idinamenzel⁩ even made fun of people messing up her name ON the show! ⁦@paramountplus⁩ and ⁦@RuPaulsDragRace⁩ who is Indina? #whoisshethough #idontknowher #rpdr #allstars

[Patrick Donnelly @PatchDonnelly]

@kellyclarkson just did an entire hour with @Pink on the @KellyClarksonTV.

We need a full album of them discussing their most meaningful songs, then singing the duet acoustically. Stripped down, no audience. Very @Indigo_Girls radio cuts #1200curfews vibe.

[Patrick Donnelly @PatchDonnelly]

This @Santos4Congress Shit is getting wilder and wilder. @ryanmurphyprod better lock down @georgesalazar immediately for the inevitable true crime biopic

[Patrick Donnelly @PatchDonnelly]

@JetBlue on hold for 45 mins@on my SECOND call when you for the VERY FIRST TIME said it would cost $25 to talk to a person, so I opted for the “text” option — which is now another 25-30 minS. I literally can’t talk to a human for free to modify my flight?!? #jetbluesucks

[Patrick Donnelly @PatchDonnelly]

@FortuneFeimster just watched your special & it was everything I wanted and more. Except… now I want to meet Craig & Linda

[Patrick Donnelly @PatchDonnelly]

@thekategaffney

[Patrick Donnelly @PatchDonnelly]

@EmersonLotzia Yeah, they definitely had a prenup so more likely he’s crying 😭

[Patrick Donnelly @PatchDonnelly]

@JaclynLeeTV and @BensalemPolice I assure you, NO ONE IS GIVING AWAY THEIR EDIBLES. The fact that this urban legend still exists… do you know how expensive it is? 😂

[Patrick Donnelly @PatchDonnelly]

@itsSHANGELA your face crack when he called you “Angela” this week after calling you “Shan-Jell-ah” the other week… I spit my drink out. #dwts

[Patrick Donnelly @PatchDonnelly]

I’m 40 yrs old & have watched @lawandordertv #SVU24 @SVUWritersRoom since I was 16. In the past 3 years they fired @JGHyder’s character (a bisexual Lebanese woman) & replaced her with a man… & now they’re taking away @KelliGiddish for a younger white woman. #done @Mariska

[Patrick Donnelly @PatchDonnelly]

Out of every intelligent joke (bc he’s 💯 so insanely talented) that @chrisrock could’ve made, he randomly went for Nicole Brown Simpson? Just say you didn’t wanna host the Oscars. How do you parallel a slap onstage into a joke about how 2 people died bc of domestic violence?