Patrick Hawley

Talks too much and doesn't work up to his potential.
Father of Brilliant Children, Lover of Books, bit of bikes & drums, अहिंसा. He/him 🏳️‍🌈

[Patrick Hawley @patrickhawley]

@_ScatRecords My Bloody Valentine - Loveless?

[Patrick Hawley @patrickhawley]

@_ScatRecords Hairy Pussy were also always good for a hi-quality release with late-at-night-at-your-day-job-copier-thievery B&W sleeve.

[Patrick Hawley @patrickhawley]

@_ScatRecords My nominee would be Tono-Bungay's Rough Music

[Patrick Hawley @patrickhawley]

@_ScatRecords It's such a fine line between stupid and clever

[Knoxville Smokies @smokiesbaseball]

It's the season of giving! We have ONE limited-edition ULTRA-RARE blind bear fitted cap we are giving away! Like and retweet for a chance to win! Winner announced Friday at 12pm EDT. #SmokiesBaseball

[Patrick Hawley @patrickhawley]

Hello @varsitytutors . Can you please respond to any of my requests for account assistance and stop charging my account? Thanks in advance!

[Alex Cohen @anothercohen]

I was laid off from Twitter this afternoon. I was in charge of managing badge access to Twitter offices.

Elon just called me and asked if I could come back to help them regain access to HQ as they shut off all badges and accidentally locked themselves out.

[Patrick Hawley @patrickhawley]

For those interested in #mastadon, here's an invite to the server I'm on. Don't miss out on my future bangers!
https://t.co/9lMbAkyUeW

[Patrick Hawley @patrickhawley]

Reminder to my future self: It's not the best idea to create a healthgrades review of your doctor whilst still coming out of your anesthesia haze.

[Patrick Hawley @patrickhawley]

I wonder if Odin ever ask an 8yo Thor "Did you comb through your hair well when you took your bath tonight?"

[Patrick Hawley @patrickhawley]

@connormacdermot @lilcutieorange Or as he would say: "ankoes"

[CBS Sports @CBSSports]

Cleveland Guardians right fielder Oscar Gonzalez has the Spongebob Squarepants theme song as his walk-up music 😂

(ESPN)

[Patrick Hawley @patrickhawley]

@lilcutieorange I'd feel bad for the bf...who wants to be called Bubba unless that's your actual name/nickname

[Patrick Hawley @patrickhawley]

@Ken_Rosenthal I can totally picture you at a @dinosaurjr show taking in their 120+dB rock!

[Patrick Hawley @patrickhawley]

@lilcutieorange If there is, I bet it changes all the time like the rules for ears. And famous people are exempt from it

[Patrick Hawley @patrickhawley]

I saw an influencer post curated photos of themselves under the caption "Life unfiltered". If there isn't a pic of you shouting "Ah, for fuck's sake!!" when your kid spills apple juice on the table, it's definitely filtered!

[Patrick Hawley @patrickhawley]

@lilcutieorange Today was "wavy" and I was presented with 2 options, but recently had to look up "bet"

[Patrick Hawley @patrickhawley]

Returning to TFW you have to look up words sent to you by GenZs on urban dictionary to see if they're slang or typos of actual words.

[Patrick Hawley @patrickhawley]

My gf: The fact that you're insane doesn't make me love you any less

[Patrick Hawley @patrickhawley]

@lilcutieorange @banana_schplit Dude