Paul New

Turns tea into games.

[Paul New @paulnew]

@BritishCycling @Shell_UKLtd You are absolutely taking the piss.

[Paul New @paulnew]

@loadingreadyrun The Delia Derbyshire-esque intro music for The Panalysts makes me so happy and nostalgic, I can't even explain.

[Paul New @paulnew]

What proportion of pumpkins carved worldwide this Halloween will be of Drumpf? Correct colour, pumpkin guts as realistic hair, etc, etc

[Paul New @paulnew]

Ah, the calm, rational, erudite debates you get from London cabbies https://t.co/8O61XuqJze

[Robert Harris @Robert___Harris]

Brexiteers are sounding increasingly like Marxists: the theory is perfect, it just hasn't been implemented properly...

[Paul New @paulnew]

The only thing more exhausting than going to IKEA is going back to IKEA because one of the boxes you picked up was the wrong box

[Brandon Morse @TheBrandonMorse]

Carl Sagan wrote this in 1996, and now I think he’s either a time traveler or a witch.

[Paul New @paulnew]

This headline is so precious. Like a puppy seeing snow for the very first time:

[Paul New @paulnew]

TIL that saying “six hundred and sixty six” in Welsh can cause serious larynx injuries for electoral returning officers.

[FrankThomas @FrankThomas27]

Tory insiders now saying that they've lost every marginal constituency that Theresa May has visited
#BBCelection

[Paul New @paulnew]

OH: “I hate the flight back to the UK. It’s full of air chavs.”

[Paul New @paulnew]

Wow, that’s very specific

[Paul New @paulnew]

And they say Shoreditch is getting less Shoreditchy: just seen a man wearing an air-pollution mask, pulled down so that he could smoke…

[Michael Schaub @michaelschaub]

Every time I see a baby boomers vs. millennials tweet I wonder if they realize there's a whole generation in between who hates them both.

[Paul New @paulnew]

Boooooooooo https://t.co/5Ozll6R2K0

[Paul New @paulnew]

“Well, you see, that part of our game’s story is explained in the upcoming tie-in novel where thearrrghleblaaaarghht;suu&edvbijf!bmorpmorp…”

[Doug Saunders @DougSaunders]

Sci-fi where the president has lost his mind and everyone knows because his private thoughts keep appearing on little slabs in their pockets

[Will McAvoy @WillMcAvoyACN]

If you had discovered there was a massive multilayered conspiracy in the deepest levels of the government against you, would you go golfing?

[Paul New @paulnew]

Dear @GiantStPauls, I think this email subject line could have done with a grammar check before being sent 😳