Payton🌜

emotional eater, online shopper, and lover of dogs, politics, and podcasts ♊️🌞♊️🌚♎️⬆️ she/her

[Payton🌜 @paytonh]

just found out you can block an entire Zodiac sign on bumble, goodbye Virgos absolutely never again 🙅🏼‍♀️

[Jo @JoJoFromJerz]

Maybe just maybe, people shouldn’t take medical advice from a guy who doesn’t know the difference between chicken pox and measles. Just a thought.

[leon alpuche @skyferrori]

this was my brat when I was 12

[slim riggins @rigginsslim]

i will make January 6 look like an ice cream social

[uncle ric @ihatethiskid]

Sorry I didn’t text you back I don’t talk to people on Sunday or Mondays

[The Notorious J.O.V. @whotfisjovana]

him: are you fucking stupid?
me:

[noah @notnoahneal]

they should let you leave work early if you’re bored & want to go home

[David Ruff @dcarterruff]

Two Celsius no breakfast

[leon akgae @sileonthill]

me pretending to be a tornado so that glen powell will chase me

[manicpixiememequeen @mpmemequeen]

the inside out characters inside of me

[m @pinkauroraxx]

live footage of me going to get my man from casa amor because i don’t even play those games fr.
#loveislandusa

[Kendall Pennington @Kenny___Rose]

when a man only has like 3 photos of himself in the last 10 years and theyre all kinda bad thats literally just how u know hes normal. u absolutely do not want the alternative

[people’s princess @sillyyyg00se]

opening their likes was like muscle memory to me now i feel like i’ve had an organ removed

[@dfarecs @lethalrejection]

if he doesn't text you back but views your instagram story it means he wants you to show up at his job

[jimmy falun gong @eviIcherub]

i dont think an nda would work on me. like im at least telling my roommate and the girls idgaf

[carriebradziwill @carriebradwh0re]

Growing up is realising Carrie Bradshaw is truly horrible and Charlotte York is a true girl’s girl

[Noor ✭ @Noorthevirgo]

is everyone losing it rn or just me and austin mcbroom?

[courtz!! ✮ @niftyghosts]

“he’s done a merlot again” lives in my head rent free

[Nick @nm234]

Me at the Academy for snubbing Greta Lee, Margot Robbie and Greta Gerwig of Oscar nominations

[chantel nanami. @chantellyyy]

I know this whole scene like the back of my hand lmfaoo