shit apple

don’t be a shit in my cut

[shit apple @penisqueefer]

Kinda life changing meeting your heroes when they’re not total dicks. Thanks for the amazing show/podcast and for just being really actually amazing and inspiring humans. @KarenKilgariff @GHardstark @MyFavMurder

[shit apple @penisqueefer]

This is just a place for me to vent about people that piss me off on other platforms

[shit apple @penisqueefer]

@dekxhed I’m sorry you’re dealing with such bullshit, I hope shit gets better for you ❤️

[shit apple @penisqueefer]

@dekxhed WOOOOOOOOWWWWW DUDE

[Anonymous @YourAnonNews]

Now that people are listening; we've got a message to all US federal troops. Do not engage in illegal orders. If you do engage in illegal orders there will be severe consequences. It is illegal for federal troops to enter states without Governor approval #Anomymous

[Seth Rogen @Sethrogen]

Always be more critical of the people upholding the racist system than the ones who are fighting against it.

[Fred Delicious 🍆 @Fred_Delicious]

I feel like such an idiot for panic-buying so much pasta. it takes like 3 packs worth to wipe your ass

[shit apple @penisqueefer]

Ok I feel much better thanks twitter !

[shit apple @penisqueefer]

I am going to use this to post my petty work bullshit so that it seems like I am the bigger person when really I am just better at hiding my true feelings using social media

[jolie 🇵🇸 @princess_labia]

this is why warren voters think he's unelectable

[☾lil ☾weedy ☾ @darth__mouth]

if i don’t get enough attention i will simply purchase something

[shit apple @penisqueefer]

@beautifuldecaay @BlackDynomyte You’re so welcome!!! You guys are gonna be amazing parents ❤️

[shit apple @penisqueefer]

@beautifuldecaay @BlackDynomyte OMG I’m so excited for you guys! Congratulations!!!

[Cara Weinberger @caraweinberger]

i thought i liked seeing movies but turns out i like eating candy in a dark room where it’s illegal to talk to me

[A Great Big Pile of Leaves @AGBPOL]

New record, there will be.

[ɱιɾα @mairume_]

Y’all.

Help, I can’t stop crying. 😭😭

[Nick Offerman @Nick_Offerman]

OH HELL YEAH NICE