Martin Perratt

Chatting pure shite since 1987. All views are my own etc, etc.

[John Collins @Logically_JC]

“They begged to have a picture with me.”

[Jamba @JambaWATP21]

How the fuck is haggis illegal in a country where you can buy a fucking machine gun way yer eggs in the morning? 😂

[GfB 📚 @Dr_Gavin_Brewis]

Scotland have basically just turned Boston into a new T in the Park. Never been so jealous.

[Martin Perratt @perratt87]

@ToryglenRangers Hahahahaha sorry mate, forgot a man of your class is above stepping foot inside such establishments!😂🤦‍♂️ SOMETIMES US PEASANTS JUST WANT A CHEAP PINT OK?!😂

[mike ☭ 🇵🇸🔻 @__mike91]

i watched every single major western news outlet deny the most obvious genocide in history

[BBC Sport Scotland @BBCSportScot]

The Tartan Army had a new member for their march in Providence earlier 🦆🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

#BBCFootball #FifaWorldCup

[Martin Perratt @perratt87]

@WalsB_irons “Prejudicial stereotypes…” 😂😂😂😂😂😂

[Scott Barber @thescottbarber]

Thankfully no treaty signed at Versailles has ever created further problems.

[Paddy Raff @paddyraffcomedy]

Describing a Toblerone to someone who’s never had one before

[Martin Perratt @perratt87]

The jealousy is fucking delicious. Fully aware they’re hated everywhere they go, with good reason I might add. Must hurt seeing Scots being universally loved just for being ourselves.

We’ll play bagpipes, yous stick to launching plastic patio furniture at each other.👍🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

[Football Away Days @FBAwayDays]

England fans in Dallas last night. 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿

“You can shove your f*cking bagpipes up your arse…” 😭�

[f 🇵🇸 @AFrazzledScot]

The people of Boston are going to become some of the strongest advocates for Scottish independence anywhere in the world after this shower descends on them

[N11 Ed @_ed19]

Husband beater

[Mark Hammond @MarkHam80780803]

“I have totally defeated you and also transferred $300 billion dollars into your bank account”

[WeRateDogs @dog_rates]

This is Bagel. He has traveled far and wide, experienced many different cultures, seen all kinds of sights, and most importantly, figured out his best angles. 13/10

[Stephen Flynn @StephenFlynnSNP]

A week to celebrate. A week to recover. An extra week just to annoy this guy.

On repeat every year until the end of time.

[Martin Perratt @perratt87]

@AmosMurphy_ I felt there were some mega hostage vibes going on here last night. “Our captors are feeding us and treating us well. Please pay the ransom as soon as possible.”

[Martin Perratt @perratt87]

@MickFerry Superb!😂👏

[Mick Ferry @MickFerry]

Sadly. Lee Dixon has the energy of man never invited to a neighbours barbecue and he writes down car registrations on his road.

[Martin Perratt @perratt87]

@509298 @Weezus07 Look at all the footage available my man. Do you see a single bit of plastic furniture being launched? Naw. Cause we’re no wanks. Were making pals, your lot are making cunts of themselves!😂😂😂😂