Pete Jacokes

Stuff and Things

[Detroit Tigers @tigers]

How can you not be romantic about baseball?

[Pete Jacokes @petejacokes]

Any chance I know anyone with roadside assistance who could help me out tonight?

[Pete Jacokes @petejacokes]

Yeah... Colbert and Kimmel... The real enemies... I just...

[Pete Jacokes @petejacokes]

Wow...

[Pete Jacokes @petejacokes]

@timothyjkay 🤮🤮🤮

[Pete Jacokes @petejacokes]

Imma throw up

[Pete Jacokes @petejacokes]

Me: How ya doing, kiddo?
Her: My back hurts.
Me: Were you and mom playing "Punch my Back"?
Her: No.
...
...
Me: There was a time you thought I was funny.
Her: How about that? I'm gonna go to bed.

[Pete Jacokes @petejacokes]

@timothyjkay Word

[Evan Handler @EvanHandler]

I don’t know if this is what will win an election, but it sure does satisfy me to see someone say it, and say it this way.

[Pete Jacokes @petejacokes]

@timothyjkay Word

[Pete Jacokes @petejacokes]

@JessLoriaKay Um... Wow

[Pete Jacokes @petejacokes]

@trouble_man90 But... But... It's CARDI B!!!!

[Pete Jacokes @petejacokes]

@timothyjkay Don't sell out to Big Solar!

[Pete Jacokes @petejacokes]

@timothyjkay DAVE N BUSTERS CAN BE SEXY!!!

[Pete Jacokes @petejacokes]

Madam Web was so spectacularly bad it actually killed my Tv...

[Pete Jacokes @petejacokes]

@ibjezz #ChristmasJoy

[Pete Jacokes @petejacokes]

@hicks_b Preach

[Pete Jacokes @petejacokes]

@hicks_b Hahahaha!! That was ONE time!