Uberpheonix, the Kwisatz Haderach

If I tweeted something, I’m probably taking a shit

[Uberpheonix, the Kwisatz Haderach @pheonix_uber]

My IP is 420.69.420.69

[cav empty @cavempty_]

trying to explain concepts to my dog that he has no hope of understanding

[jeanne d'larp 🦋🔆 @ourmartyredlady]

does marvel really have a soyjak dragon?

[The Ginger Swindler @lilydsmith]

sure elmo

[cav empty @cavempty_]

my boss added a custom ai generated gif of me being mauled by a lion to our teams app and HR says they don’t have the ability to remove it

[Anna 🦊🏳️‍🌈 ✈️ MC Amsterdam @LaZorraDeAnna]

El martillo de thor sólo puede ser equipado por criaturas legendarias dignas que no sean villanas, como por ejemplo...

[Ashley Bits @ashleybits]

Accidentally sent the pizza delivery guy my modern decklist when he asked for the location

[Uberpheonix, the Kwisatz Haderach @pheonix_uber]

@_NotShadowNinja It's referencing a run title

[tex @texmeplease]

white people evolving bruh

[Uberpheonix, the Kwisatz Haderach @pheonix_uber]

Can't believe they didn't even mention the first human councilor

[ToonHive @ToonHive]

Keith David will receive a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame this Thursday.

[No.2 Type B 🌊 @S00GE]

God of War: Laufey

[Quantavius Nutsack @dirtyharrypussy]

Was told there wasn’t a dress code at work but got sent home for expressing myself? Unbelievable.

[Lloyd Legalist @LloydLegalist]

I'm sure you're all wondering why I've gathered you here today.

[punished indeed @punishedindeed]

trump is having productive conversations with nute gunray

[krill @anthraxp1mp]

He is black and I learned something

[TheDailyLBP @TheDailyLBP]

great things happening at state of play

[DiscussingFilm @DiscussingFilm]

Official cover art for ‘GOD OF WAR - LAUFEY’.

Coming soon to PS5.

[Uberpheonix, the Kwisatz Haderach @pheonix_uber]

The run-on sentence I just wrote:

[Uberpheonix, the Kwisatz Haderach @pheonix_uber]

Just thought about the time I had to wait for 30 minutes in line behind the smelliest person on earth to buy Magic cards at Walmart cuz, a week before, two Pokémon scalpers got into a fistfight apparently