Pickering 🐙

Die hard Wings fan with beer league talent,
WIIM Contributor

[Elliotte Friedman @FriedgeHNIC]

This is not the only piece of business Edmonton is doing today

Hearing the Oilers are also closing in on a 7x7M extension with the Pride of Armour Heights, Jake Walman

Big day for them

[Pickering 🐙 @Pickering88]

@rybark13 👀

[Columbus Blue Jackets @BlueJacketsNHL]

Tonight we honor the lasting impact that Johnny Gaudreau has made on the game of hockey, the city of Columbus, his family, friends and teammates, and all those who will continue to be inspired by his play ❤️

[Adam Herman @AdamZHerman]

PHILLY!!!!! DON'T PULL THE GOALIE PHILLY! YOU'RE ALREADY ELIMINATED! TORTS DON'T DO IT! A REGULATION WIN WON'T HELP YOU! TORTS IT DOESN'T MATTER FOR YOU ANYMORE! PHILLY PUT THE GOALIE BACK! TORTS STOP IT! TOOOOORTS!!!!

[Pierre LeBrun @PierreVLeBrun]

Hertl is expected back before the playoffs, FYI

[Pickering 🐙 @Pickering88]

The cap is only real if you believe it is

[Frank Seravalli @frank_seravalli]

Guentzel update: Not definitive, but sounds like teams in mix are CAR, FLA, NYR, VAN and VGK.

Unless something changes, belief is FLA + VAN have made strong push but don’t have goods to pull it off.

Of note: VGK could potentially create more cap room if Martinez goes on LTIR.

[Alicia M @lcaee4]

Delilah got a special visit from players of the Toronto Maple Leafs today. It's so beautiful that they took time out of their day to visit the patients here at @sickkids both big and small 💜 @Pickering88
#davidkampf #conortimmins #matthewknies #torontomapleleafs

[Ryan Reynolds @VancityReynolds]

I love these little pr*cks. Support @SickKids today.

[Pickering 🐙 @Pickering88]

When you and your brother make a scene in public and you get this look from dad, you know you're getting your asses whooped as soon as you get home 🤣

[Spittin' Chiclets @spittinchiclets]

The Tkachuk Bowl going how you’d expect https://t.co/fxstutxQNX

[Ryan Hana @RyanHanaWWP]

Lucas Raymond puts Eyssimont into the bench and the LCA ERUPTS! Huge hit. 🔥 #LGRW

[Pickering 🐙 @Pickering88]

Mixon -5 yards on his last 3 carries, @DraftKings do the right thing 😅 #AllTimeBadBeat

[Pickering 🐙 @Pickering88]

Preach coach ��

[The Grind Line Podcast™ @GrindLinePod]

Per Lalonde, they will try and play Rasmussen on the wing this season. Says he is more effective there, more productive, and can drive lines. Was one of the top players last season. Had an excellent day in camp today.
#LGRW #RedWings

[Pickering 🐙 @Pickering88]

Go Pride #Lions

[Rob DenBleyker @RobDenBleyker]

I ain't typing "X" into the URL bar my wife is right behind me

[Pickering 🐙 @Pickering88]

@iyer_prashanth Got burned on a couple of misses. But I'm very proud of the Detroit/Tampa pick. I will forever remember seeing him toss a stick to a fan during a warmup.

[Sens Communications @Media_Sens]

News Release: The #Sens have acquired forward Dominik Kubalik, prospect defenceman Donovan Sebrango, a conditional 2024 first-round draft pick and Detroit’s 2024 fourth-round selection in a trade w/ @DetroitRedWings in exchange for forward Alex DeBrincat: https://t.co/yOAcnmzBEl

[Pickering 🐙 @Pickering88]

Between the return and the contract, all is forgiven for dragging this out. The big swing this team needed while using the leverage they had on Ottawa.

[Detroit Red Wings @DetroitRedWings]

UPDATE: The #RedWings today acquired forward Alex DeBrincat from the Ottawa Senators in exchange for Dominik Kubalik, Donovan Sebrango, a conditional 1st round pick and a 4th round pick in 2024.

[Brad Krysko WWP @BradKrysko]

Stevie actually did it. That son of a bitch actually did it.

[Brad Krysko WWP @BradKrysko]

I love this.

[Rob Gucci @heatdaddy69420]

2023 Draft Breakdown - by heatdaddy
(KEEP IN MIND: I have no idea what the fuck I'm talking about. I am so god damn old dude. I heard them say Connor Bedardzo was born in 2005 and I spit out my gree tea, yes I love green tea it's fucking sick. 2005? What? So you basically don't even remember where you were at when 9/11 happened. That's absolutely wild).

1. Chicago Blackhawks selected Connor Bedard: I had no idea Chicago was going to draft this kid. I could not tell because of the way the NHL posted about it 7,000 times in the past week and not 10,000 times. To be honest, I haven't watched a lot of this kid at all. I'm a rebel by nature so when the NHL decided to start doing Bedard content all day every day I immediately said to myself, as I'm slouched on the couch eating Chex mix and drinking gatorade, I hope this guy puts up a 30 point season - and that's absolutely no disrespect to Connor and his family at all. I wish Bedard the best in his career and hope he turns around the Chicago Blackhawks franchise who has been in turmoil as of late, definitely not because of their own self inflicted decisions though. The fact that Gary bettman handed this pick to Chicago should tell you that that's how the world works, buddy. It's all about the dollar dollar bills. Shoutout Wu Tang Clan. Gary literally said I do not give a fuck what's going down in this locker room all I know is that the TV market is too hot to not give Bedard to O-Block and the rest of the community. Gary "Tv Dollar Bills" Bettman is what they used to call him in high school. That, and "Pickle Sniff" but don't ask me why they used to call him that, you have to ask him. The last thing Gary wanted was to have to choose another market to do the next 50 winter classics in. The whole point of a fucking classic is that it's supposed to be unique and once in a while, right? Too bad Gary saw dollar signs and decided to make it the Winter every other business quarter classic. Thanks Gary. Anyways, congrats to Chicago you guys really deserved that pick. NOT! Fuck you.

2. Anaheim Ducks select Leo Carlsson: No idea who this guy is, haven't seen him play once, yet here I am doing a full blown write up on the draft because I have nothing else better to do. I don't have a fucking job, and I'm never going to get hired to do anything - and I'm okay with that! Me and jobs just don't work. Let me give you an example of the last time I had a job. The last job I had was insane. This dude (my boss) would send me out to open up houses for showings (real estate) in the most treacherous neighborhoods you can ever imagine. With all due respect to Ukraine (I guess?...) this neighborhood was arguably worse. This fucking douchebag would always say "Oh, you'll get a slice of the deal if it closes for doing the ground work and doing the showings" so in my head I'm like okay cool that would be sweet. I was ok with doing some of the slime ball work I had to do to rise through the ranks of the biggest douchebag industry on the planet, Real estate, where every person who passes as simple test automatically thinks they're a generational deal making guru and a market expert when in reality they just are too fucking dumb to do anything else. They see one Grant Cardone video, learn how to tie a tie, and think they are a superstar broker on Selling Sunset. It's fucking crazy. So not everyone is like that, but a lot of them. Anyways, this one particular day this boss of mine sends me out to this house in a super sketchy neighborhood to open up a house for his client. As I roll up to the house, there's a van in the street in front of the property and a few dudes crowded around it and they immediately all stare at me as if I'm not supposed to be there. So I kept driving because it was sketchy. Finally, I'm like fuck I gotta just do my job here so I make a U Turn and go park outside the house near the van. As I'm sitting in my car waiting for the client to pull up, a guy starts approaching my car while holding what seems to be a gun in his waistline. I sat there in shock like is this dude really walking up to my side of the car gripping a gun? Yup, big time. I speed off. About 30 seconds later I get a call from the client who said that they pulled up to the house and there was some type of "big drug deal" going down in the middle of the street. I said yeah, I saw that too, I'm sorry I didn't warn you I just sped off and was in a bit of a panic. Long story short, they say it's all good and it's not the neighborhood for them anyways..blah blah blah. So then, I call my boss and I tell him what happened. The guy is fucking RATTLED at me. Like "you didn't fucking show them the house?!?" I said something like no dude I mean I'm pretty sure I just got a gun almost pulled on me so I drove away and the client didn't feel safe either. Click. Fast forward to the next weekly meeting: My boss actually called me a pussy, that I "bitched-out" during a showing because of how I left the property and didn't do it. This is in front of the entire company, not a big company, but still. I was like what? What the fuck do you actually want me to do in that situation? Sit there and get shot in the head in my 16 dollar j crew collared shirt while working for pennies on the dollar? I didn't say something like that, I don't remember saying anything bad actually. I just said yeah I didn't really feel safe, something like that. Not gonna lie, I'm afraid of people pulling guns on me in unfamiliar neighborhoods. I guess that's a huge fault of mine and something I need to work on. So yeah, that was basically it. He didn't back down either, this guy had such a warped sense of reality that he thought I should have got out of the car and continued the showing when clearly their was some sort of gang shit going down RIGHT outside the house. I ended up quitting shortly after that, and by the way the guy never paid me a single dollar for doing all the ground work I did for him, when he said he would. Anyways I have no idea why the Ducks wouldn't take Fantilli right here.

3. Columbus Blue Jackets select Adam Fantilli: This was such an obvious pick for them after Anaheim fucked that all up. I've heard this guy is a stud and I'm just going to continue to be lazy and not follow up with any sort of real insight or analysis because also who the fuck would ever come to this twitter page for any real insight or analysis. I like that this kid scores goals. Big dude who can move and put pucks in the net. That's old time hockey, and that's what gets shit done in the playoffs. Not to say that undersized guys can't do it, but there's something about a college hockey guy with a NHL ready frame that I really like right now. I also saw that he really did want to go to Columbus which is pretty cool - he mentioned that he knows some of the lads in the organization so I guess that makes up for the fact that you won't see the playoffs for the next decade and you gotta hear mike babcocks ballsack slap against his leg while he's jogging laps around the arena concourse all day before game time just thinking about which young skilled player he's going to put in a mental pretzel so they eventually end up wanting to ask for a trade out of town. All in all, I really like some of the Blue Jackets players it's just a matter of how they're going to handle mike Babcock coming into the locker room and making them write down lists of their least favorite religions and then going and showing the media what they wrote and other shenanigans like that, but I guess that's just the big leagues. People forget that even though these professional athletes make a lot of money and are truly living out dream lives, they still have to deal with workplace politics and dickheads in their life that want to tear them down and screw them over. Kind of like me, when my broker wanted me to get shot in the head on a side street in Phoenix while making barely any money and just trying to get experience in the real estate business. Whatever industry you're in, there's always going to be obstacles to hurdle. It's never a straight line, it's always going to be a roller coaster. The first thing I would do if I'm Adam Fantilli is when I meet Mike Babcock I'd shake his hand and say "don't fuck with me buddy" and then just walk away. Let him know that it's not 1991 anymore, this isn't his league. This is Adam's league. This is the future.

4. San Jose Sharks select Will Smith: Keep his wife's name out of yo mouth!!!!

5. Montreal Canadiens select David........................uh......................aha...................................................."we planned it this way" Reinbacher: Reinbacher? I barely even know her! LMAOOOOOO I'll be here all fucking night you piece of shit nobody will ever take this keyboard away from me I wouldn't leave this keyboard even if somebody from phoenix pointed a gun at me and said give me your keyboard right now I would say fuck off you piece of shit I'm in the middle of a tweet that consists of 25,0000 fucking characters dude. The Robber would be like what? how can you tweet that much? that's impossible. You can only tweet 280 characters, man. And I would say no you imbecile, I have twitter blue. Not only is my blue check mark cool to show strangers at bars, I can write more words in a single tweet and also people think I pay for twitter and I have to say no pal, twitter pays me. You can subscribe to my twitter page for 2.99 and it provides you with more content, more of my personal thoughts, and more pictures of my feet you stupid fuck. Want more newsletters like this? Subscribe to my profile and you will get them. Anyways, the robber would be like damn that's insane my bad dude you're like halfway to 25,000 characters and I would say it's all good man, lets not act like we don't storm into other peoples homes with guns and threaten their lives. I feel like everyone does that. Then I'd offer him a beer and we'd just hang out and play video games and shit and I'd explain to him that Mountain Dew Hard would benefit so much from giving me a brand deal. Yeah, like, I'm not a big fish and I don't have millions of followers but my engagement is truly insane and I think it would be mutually beneficial for both companies if I promoted something I truly like drinking such as mountain dew hard. It's so fucking good and every time I crack open a can of it, 10 steaming hot Puerto Rican women knock on my door ferociously and ask if they can spend the night and watch black mirror. And I have to say no I don't really like that show, some of it is interesting but for the most part every episode is the same like there's just some weird fucked up shit that happens that could possibly happen in the future and Idk I just can't really get into watching episode after episode of fucked up shit. I just like to watch shows that make me laugh. And then the Puerto Rican chicks are like fine we don't have to watch that but we still all want to sleep over naked and I'm like fine, you can stay the night but don't eat the granola or the blue berries because I put them in my yogurt and it's like a good way to get rid of your sweet tooth without piling on the bad calories. I'm so fucking dizzy typing this right now and also my mom is texting me that I need to go to the dentist because I accidentally told her that I haven't been to the dentist in like 15 years. Why does she care? It's my mouth, it's my life. Don't control my mouth mom that's just kind of weird and it's freaking me the fuck out. Good luck to Adam Fantilly in Christopher Columbus.

6. Arizona Coyotes select Dmitri Simashev: Here's the low down on this kid, he's probably not even going to report to the team and if he does my prediction is that he plays under 10 games. Arizona continues to impress everybody by constantly being the dumbest mother fucekrs in the room. Hey Arizona - here is my advice. Pick the OBVIOUS next best player. That's all you guys have to do. Stop trying to act like Steve Yzerman and act like you have an Yzerplan when you don't have one. Because you don't. Just pick the next. best. player. I don't give a shit what you think your team needs. You need good players, that's it. Doesn't matter what position, at all. Why are you reaching all the way down the board and acting like you even watched more than 1 game of this kid? You didn't. Nobody thinks "oh shit, Arizona reached down the board they must know something we don't." Nobody thinks that. Everybody is like welp, here we go with Arizona again. Drafting 10 dudes, 1 will play, and then when it's time to pay him after developing him for 4 years you just trade for more picks. The never ending rebuild continues in Arizona. It's truly fucking mind blowing. I want this team to do well, I really do. But when you're drafting two Russians in the top 12 it's like yeah dude I mean I highly doubt these guys are fired up to play for you. I really doubt it. Michkov was RIGHT THERE. It was so easy. The team that just won the cup was 110% Canadian. Maybe pick some Canadian guys that have some heart and have some passion for the game and not guys that don't even know where Arizona is on the map. I'm not trying to call these Russian kids dumb I'm just saying they know two cities in America, New York and Miami. I just think they royally fucked up with this pick and only time will tell. I also don't know what the fuck I'm talking about. so none of this even matters. I'm so dizzy right now I'm gonna go to bed. Bye.