Resham

Building

[Resham @piplimoon]

@petersagal I had a joke about being a woman in tech but I'll just wait for a man to say it louder in a meeting six months later.

[Resham @piplimoon]

How did YOU wrangle your baby clothing stitch?

#parenting #momlife

[Resham @piplimoon]

Or how much of it you’ll go through when you’re dealing with spit-up, blowouts, and mid-change meltdowns.
And the weather. Honestly, let's put babies in footie jammies 24/7. But then, what kinda math sorcery do I need to calculate how many I need? 6/

[Resham @piplimoon]

I know how to look at hundreds of spreadsheets and synthesize what’s best for my family. So I buckled up and started doing what I do best: build stuff with millions of data points. I built a planner for 0–12M baby clothes based on weather + laundry.
Want it? Ask me. 8/

[Resham @piplimoon]

Then there’s the laundry. THE LAUNDRY!!
I’ve had people ask me for spreadsheets(!) to figure out how many of each item they need after having a baby. Honestly? They’re not wrong to ask. Because nobody tells you what your baby will actually wear. 5/

[Resham @piplimoon]

Baby clothes are a scam and I will die on this hill

Before I had a kid, I thought baby clothes were cute. Little onesies! Tiny shoes! I couldn't wait to buy ALL OF THEM.

Then I had a baby. And it slowly dawned on me that baby clothes are a psyop designed to break you.
1/

[Resham @piplimoon]

I have an actual PhD & still couldn’t line 'em up at 3AM with a crying newborn projectile sharting across the room.
The well-meaning old ladies at the grocery store preaching the gospel of baby hats. Do you think he’s about to hop on a zoom call with the league of mad-hatters? 4/

[Resham @piplimoon]

They can’t tell you if they’re hot or cold, so you’re just out here trying to Goldilocks them into survival. Googling “How many layers for a newborn at night at 67 degrees? Wtaf is TOG?”
And don’t even get me started about snaps. Snap-bottom onesies nearly broke me. 3/

[Resham @piplimoon]

I started out trying to get him “ready for the day.” Because I watched a GRWM mom influencer tiktok (thanks pp hormones on steroids and middle of the night feeds). Well, that was a game of wrestlemania topped with diaper roulette that I am not gonna play anymore.

2/

[Resham @piplimoon]

"Bought a used baby monitor off Facebook Marketplace. Turned it on and heard someone whisper, ‘You came back.’ Nope. Absolutely not."

Daily reason #2 to stay on #Facebook #marketplace instead of joining https://t.co/7JOi2coAu1.

[Resham @piplimoon]

Just like this auto-response from @james_smith071 👇🏽

[Resham @piplimoon]

Starting today, I'll give you one reason to not join https://t.co/7JOi2coAu1 everyday.

Reason 1: You love spam. You can't live without bots. You love getting scammed so much, you are scamming yourself by not joining https://t.co/7JOi2coAu1

[Resham @piplimoon]

@IlirSela @slice Woohoo! My favorite city!

[Resham @piplimoon]

@Ellen_Friedman @quickwitter @ted_dunning Gross..

[Resham @piplimoon]

@Ellen_Friedman @robinanil Happy happy New Year to Ted and you too! Haven't been around these woods. Miss you both!

[Resham @piplimoon]

@mayur_rustagi @robinanil Fox shares already plummeted since this was announced. They will find another way to make more money. Capitalism only really works if you want to make it work for you real bad.

[Resham @piplimoon]

@Tajmaballer I'm right there with you. But the season from Trader Joe's is good on an avocado toast.

[Resham @piplimoon]

@Ellen_Friedman Get better soon!

[Resham @piplimoon]

@ravihanda Well then India TV will have breaking news to cover