Amy

My favourite things 🐶 📚 📺 🍫

[Amy @plainamyjane]

What. A. Series. 👌🏻

[Netflix UK & Ireland @NetflixUK]

Brace yourselves.

#TheGentlemen Season 2 is now playing, only on Netflix.

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

A recent report says that voice notes are huge across the world… apart from in Britain.

Here’s my two cents (or pennies) on why I dislike voice notes:

1. I don’t want to have to put in earphones or find a quiet place when out and about, just for you to tell me “yes” or “no” about whether you’re free for a cup of tea next Wednesday.

2. While I’m watching telly, I want to be able to glance down at my phone and get the information I need in text form. I don’t want to have to turn the telly off and listen to your private podcast that’s just for me.

3. I don’t want to wade through three minutes of waffle and chit-chat I never asked for when a thumbs-up emoji will do.

4. It makes me feel like you expect a voice note back - and I’m not doing that.

5. I have no interest in tangents about how you’ve just seen an interesting pigeon on the pavement. I asked if you could give me a lift to the station, and 12 minutes in you’re talking about a pigeon and I’ve missed my train.

6. The convenience is all yours. It’s quick to send a voice note, but much slower for me to consume it. It’s bad manners.

I think that about covers it. Of course, if voice notes are a more accessible option for the sender (due to difficulty typing, vision impairment, language barriers, etc.), that’s completely understandable - a different kettle of fish! But if you just like waffling, I’d rather not be the waffle sounding board.

(Really I think I’m just jealous of people who are able to talk coherently for minutes at a time).

[Amy @plainamyjane]

@JoannaCannon I've had this on my shelf for ages, I must get round to reading it!

[Amy @plainamyjane]

I'm doing that I-should-really-go-to-sleep-because-I've-got-to-get-up-early-but-don't-want-to-go-to-sleep-because-then-it-will-be-Monday-and-I'll-have-to-go-to-work thing 🙃

[Amy @plainamyjane]

Hard relate 👌🏻

[Amy @plainamyjane]

Why do companies give you the option of opting out of marketing emails for Mother's Day and Father's Day but not Valentine's Day?

[Amy @plainamyjane]

When your Hinge match replies to your message with a voice note

[Amy @plainamyjane]

@DC_F1 We're talking 20 years ago Damo, all I can give you is that it was blue and had four wheels 😂

[Amy @plainamyjane]

@DC_F1 One word for it 😅

[Amy @plainamyjane]

R.I.P. Chop 😭

[WeRateDogs @dog_rates]

Here are the Top 5 Dogs of the week!

[Amy @plainamyjane]

@dog_rates Watson sympathises.

[Amy @plainamyjane]

@DC_F1 Well said Damo 👏🏻

[Amy @plainamyjane]

@Nomio1984 I love that dress 🤍

[Amy @plainamyjane]

I have to say, of all the exotic locations I'm considering holidaying in this year, this isn't top of my list @BootsUK 🤔

[Amy @plainamyjane]

I think Frank might be on to something ❤️

[WeRateDogs @dog_rates]

This is Frank. He has found that the secret to happiness is a couple flowers, a lot of sunshine, and the occasional midday nap. 13/10

[Amy @plainamyjane]

@DC_F1 I AM LOFUX. Accurate, my fux have never been more lo.

[Amy @plainamyjane]

@SoVeryBritish Coeliacs reading this like

[Amy @plainamyjane]

INCREDIBLE. Chef's kiss. No notes.

[Netflix @netflix]

Goodbye, YOU. The fifth and final season is NOW PLAYING.

[Amy @plainamyjane]

@bluelightcard how can I establish my colleagues' eligibility for a blue light card please? Some of us have been accepted for a card and others rejected, but we all work for the same company. Your online contact form doesn't have an option for this type of query.