Heather P

Christian. Wife. Arkansas artist. Cat lover.

[Meredith @meralee727]

If a movie theater was legitimately on fire, Trump wouldn’t yell fire because he wouldn’t want people to panic. Instead, he’d call it hoax and explain that the fire would miraculously go away on its own....while everyone inside the theater dies.

[Heather P @pocketivens]

@BRObizley @thegallowboob I miss my life before covid but I don't know what to do with my life.

😂😂 well then. Didn't think I'd call myself out like that. 😭

[Meredith @meralee727]

Trump blames Obama for:
1. The Titanic
2. Pimento loaf
3. Black Plague OG
4. Multisyllabic words
5. Baby Jessica falling in the well
6. Hindenburg disaster
7. Paper cuts
8. My So Called Life getting cancelled
9.Amelia Earhart’s disappearance
10.Nic Cage’s movie role choices

[Angry Staffer @Angry_Staffer]

The White House is flipping the fuck out about how close coronavirus is getting to Trump and Pence — and tightening restrictions — while telling you to go back to work and send your kids back to school.

[Michael McFaul @McFaul]

Trump did not close down anything -- not a state, a school, a business, or a county. So Trump cannot open up anything.

[Adam Parkhomenko @AdamParkhomenko]

So how many American lives is trump prepared to sacrifice for the stock market?

[Angry Staffer @Angry_Staffer]

The UK just locked down too.

If we let Trump being restless convince people that now is the time to ease restrictions, we will be the only country in the world doing so, and hundreds of thousands will die as a result.

[Tony Posnanski @tonyposnanski]

Rand Paul got tested. He had no symptoms. He tested positive.

Everyone needs to be tested. Not just the elite.

[Angry Staffer @Angry_Staffer]

Imagine being Rand Paul and voting against coronavirus testing for all Americans then somehow getting a coronavirus test even though you were asymptotic

[Heather P @pocketivens]

Yall. @BRObizley called me "baby" which is odd cause he always calls me "babe." Didnt think much of it until he started laughing and said he was going to say babe, but he was also thinking about Tom Brady.. 😂😂😂

[Amy Siskind @Amy_Siskind]

It’s hard to image a more diabolical situation than a global pandemic under an authoritarian leader who has convinced his supporters that science and news are fake, and he is the only credible source of info. And then he tells them not to worry - continue to go out into crowds.

[Jeremy Klemin @JeremyKlemin]

Damn, Norway.

[Meredith @meralee727]

The people outraged about J.Lo and Shakira’s halftime show are the same people who consider a former nude model the classiest First Lady ever

[Kristin Chirico @KristinChirico]

The Charlie Day Tide Cinematic Universe is the best part of this Super Bowl

[Heather P @pocketivens]

@BRObizley Ain't gonna happen booboo.

[TalkThirtyToMe™ @TalkThirty]

Thanks for that, Google

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ @BRObizley]

Bruh 😂😂😂😂😂

[Chris Hayes @chrislhayes]

Here's the ugly truth at the core of all of this: the president actually can do whatever he wants - rob, cheat, steal, murder - if he can hold 34 senate votes.

[TalkThirtyToMe™ @TalkThirty]

My favorite holiday tradition is laying on the floor in the fetal position whining that I feel like I’m going to die because I ate so much then getting up 10 minutes later and eating more and then repeating that cycle over and over until someone threatens to throw me into traffic

[Shannon Watts @shannonrwatts]

Sarah Huckabee Sanders wants to be the Governor of Arkansas, but is online mocking Joe Biden for stuttering. Feel sorry for any constituents she’d represent who have a disability. #arleg