Larry Smith

Comedian. Renowned simpleton. Host of Convince Me on NPRIllinois (The Front Row Network). Also Zig and Larry Ignore a Topic. [email protected]

[Chris Calogero @RealChrisCal]

So excited to record this album. I don’t have management or reps or labels behind me. I’ve whiffed on, missed, or never got opportunities in the past but I’m funnier than ever in my life and doing this DIY. Your support getting the word out is super appreciated! Let’s rock!

[Larry Smith @poundsmith2]

@ATRightMovies UI You

[Larry Smith @poundsmith2]

@DaRealAloysius All that said, imagine the insufferable nature of someone who was the president of the stand-up comedians union.

[Larry Smith @poundsmith2]

Jason Aldean looks like he fucks with his socks on.

Jason Aldean looks like he’d yell “do you know who my dad is” during mildly rough sex.

Jason Aldean looks like he’d break the second controller if you were beating him at Mario Kart.

Jason Aldean looks like a shitgibbon.

[Larry Smith @poundsmith2]

@nathantimmel I really like this dude.

[Larry Smith @poundsmith2]

@RichardBComedy Maui Bay Inn, Senior!

[Larry Smith @poundsmith2]

Hey, standup comics, I don’t care if you look like Bert or Matt, just leave your damn shirt on.

[Larry Smith @poundsmith2]

They’re using the term “comedian” pretty loosely here.

[chris evans @notcapnamerica]

Did....did she really just say what I think she said?

[Larry Smith @poundsmith2]

@RichardBComedy I know the guy producing that show felt that way.

[Larry Smith @poundsmith2]

@nathantimmel If the sentence starts with “Famous YouTube Prankster” that’s where my empathy ends.

[Larry Smith @poundsmith2]

@HarderBrunch Comin’ in hawt, bay-bee!

[Larry Smith @poundsmith2]

@HarderBrunch That would be an rad fun time, but I’m booked up through Wisconsin that weekend.

[John Moe @johnmoe]

SERGEANT: The suspect knows something.

MEAN COP: I’ll beat the truth out of him!

NICE COP: Let me reason with the kid.

DAVID LEE ROTH COP: Bizzy siddy bop bop! Whooo! Awright!

SGT: Dammit, Roth Cop. Be serious.

DLR COP: (earnestly) Ziggity bop. Uh-huh. Yow.

[Larry Smith @poundsmith2]

This has to be at a Kum-N-Go.

[Larry Smith @poundsmith2]

Went to my first Hot Pot/Korean BBQ place tonight. Had a mild panic attack. Cooked my own food. Had the waiter chastise me for putting too much food in my hot pot and potentially causing a fire. 10/10. Would put my dick in the macaroni salad again.

[Larry Smith @poundsmith2]

@RichardBComedy That’s why @TheWienerCircle is where it’s at! Better grub and no racism or bigotry.

[BestTrashPlayer @besttrashplayer]

Trash In Terror. Must be a Wednesday! (18+) https://t.co/zJMMqfZTix

[Larry Smith @poundsmith2]

@RealChrisCal @dbubcomedy Think you can point Chris in the right direction?