Pretend Office

Almost certainly among the best companies in the field that it's in

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It's taken longer than planned but it's finally ready!

Our foresight team is excited to reveal our 2020 "iRoad To 2030 e-Strategy"!! We are advising our clients to focus all their energies on Twitter going forward. TWEET TWEET!!

To order your copy please phone Carol on 020 7378

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This hacker has hacked into our e-mail network! We are advising all companions to recall every email with immediately effect

There will be an 180 degree enlightening session for all cluster marshalls at 8.30AM in Richard Stilgoe or “remote mates” may dial in to ext 999. Thankyo

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@hugovk No.

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We regret to announce that our Email system has been infected by the coronaviral. Please use our newsletter system to alteratanive until father notice. thank You.

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This is to notify all playmates that Gina G is now locked and will remain inaccessible for 14 days. Next week's Vital Virals confrontation will instead take place in Brian Cant. Have a great week end, especially those of you working hard on the DHSC pitch!!

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For all of our co-entrepreneuers, if you have had any contact with Kevin from the print room over the past forntnight please head to Gina G immediately without touching anything or breathing out. This is a purely routine announcement and nothing to worry about. Thankyou.

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Also this is to remind colleagues that there is only one bottle of hand sanitiser remaining. To ensure it's most effective use, Deborah is in charge of this - please see her in Phoebe Cates after shaking the hands of any visitors. Thankyou.

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Please note that only colleagues of Big Shot level and above are currently permitted to Work From Home without priar approvals. Damon will be hosting the next Health and Safety Encounter as normal and will be sure to issue any updates soon after that in the new financial year!!

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@gilest What sort of thing?

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What's happening?

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@gilest I am!

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@gilest Oh hang on.

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@gilest I’m not wearing headphones!

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@JamesWallis Hi Jim!!

The responsibilities for this fall under our new outsourcing arrangement and a “ticket” was raised only 3 weeks after you first brought it to our attention.

Apparently this issue is “on the board” to be assessed in the first instance no later than Q2 2020.

I hope this

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Stack us on Substack #socialmedial

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We're celebrating Appropriate Emojicons week at Pretend Office. What are your favourite Appropriate Emojicons? Facebook us immediately with your answers. 🦏 🍤 ➿

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@hugovk It's easy to recover your GDPR password: simply sign in to our WebPortal with your GDPR password, and click "Email me my password" - your password will be emailed to your registered address, ready to copy-and-paste #servicedesign #customersatisfection

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URGENT #GPDR WARNING: TODAY IS YOUR FINAL CHANCE. YOU MUST DELETE YOURSELF FROM OUR MAILING LIST AND THEN REJOIN IT USING YOUR GDPR PASSWORD. FAILURE TO DO THIS WILL MEAN YOU NO LONGER HAVE VALUED STAKEHOLDER STATUS WITH US. Kind regards.

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it’s Tuesday! Accessibility week