happy world mental health day. cheers to all those days you lost & all those days you got back up. the heaviness might stay longer on some days, it might come even after you restructure & rebuild yourself from the ground. so let hope persist just as hard as the weight you carry.
Normalise saying "Astagfirullahi wa atubu ilaihi" the moment you feel jealous, get evil thoughts, and feel disappointed and hurt.
Trust me, all the negativity will flee and you will feel normal and Allah will become happy with you.