Roy

I use over 500m tokens per month.
Gamepass PC/Xbox Explorer.

[Techzim @Techzim]

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[Roy @r0y263]

@mkhululidube17 @freemanchari If we are being honest, Egypt wasted many chances, we could have lost by a very wide margin if it wasn't for poor finishing from Egypt and some okay goalkeeping by Arubi. We used hope as a strategy.

[Peter Girnus 🦅 @gothburz]

The company hired me to lead their "Agile Transformation."
I don't know what Agile means.
Nobody does.
That's why it works.

I make $425,000 a year.
To move sticky notes.
From left to right.
On a board.
The board is digital now.
The sticky notes cost $80,000 in Jira licenses.
Progress.

Day one, I said "we need to break down silos."
Everyone nodded.
Silos are bad.
I don't know why.
But destroying them is a career.
My career.

I introduced "squads."
Squads are teams.
But disrupted.
We disrupted the teams into teams.
Different names.
Same people.
Same problems.
But Agile problems now.
Agile problems are strategic.

A senior engineer asked what we're actually changing.
I said, "The mindset."
He asked what that means.
I said, "It's a journey."
He asked where we're going.
I said, "Toward agility."
He asked what agility means.
I pointed at the sticky notes.
They were moving left to right.
That's velocity.
We have velocity now.

The VP of Engineering said two-week sprints don't fit their work.
I said, "That's waterfall thinking."
Waterfall is bad.
Like silos.
I don't know what waterfall is.
But I know it's bad.
She stopped talking.
Waterfall accusations end conversations.

We had a retrospective.
In the retro, we discussed what went wrong.
Everything went wrong.
We put it on sticky notes.
Then we moved the sticky notes.
Into a column called "Parking Lot."
The Parking Lot is where problems go to die.
It's full.
We don't look at it.
That's agile.

Velocity is up 40%.
I defined velocity.
I also defined the points.
I also defined the stories.
We're crushing it.
At the things I made up.
To measure.
Ourselves.

The CEO asked for ROI.
I showed a chart.
The chart went up.
Charts should go up.
This one did.
I didn't label the Y-axis.
Nobody asked.
Leadership is confidence.

We do standups now.
Every day.
We stand.
For 45 minutes.
Standing is agile.
Sitting is waterfall.
My legs hurt.
But we're transforming.

The transformation is now "Phase 3."
Phase 1 was assessment.
Phase 2 was implementation.
Phase 3 is "continuous improvement."
Continuous means forever.
Forever means job security.
I'm very secure.

My contract was extended.
Three more years.
For "cultural impact."
The culture is confused.
But impacted.

Agile transformation isn't about being agile.
It's about transforming.
Continuously.
Toward more transformation.
The destination is the journey.
The journey is billable.

[Roy @r0y263]

@Techzim The problem of unregulated markets...

[Roy @r0y263]

Debating a flat earther is like debating a 4-year-old child. Very limited understanding of simple observable things.

[Roy @r0y263]

@MiddieMusa27772 @Nyaj_insky Do not defend the indefensible

[Roy @r0y263]

@O_Mighty_ @Pablozw1_ Flagships are supported for much longer this day, that includes the Pixel 6.

[Glen Dhliwayo @GlenDhliwayo]

Zimbabwean Banks and Mobile Finance Services must stop charging people for requesting balances. That’s a rip off, honestly! 👍🏾

[Roy @r0y263]

@FabrizioRomano @ActuFoot_ Aston Villa to win it

[Roy @r0y263]

@denvertc @crimewatchzw It's that simple.. and if it's successful, he will get global recognition, no questions asked.

It's just that simple

[Roy @r0y263]

Making an entire video using AI is brilliant and concerning at the same time. What will become of the arts value chain 😱 as this tech reaches perfection

[WinkyD FanPage⚪🇿🇼 @WinkyDFan]

Winky D, Fake Love🔥🔥

https://t.co/x7O17HefIp

[Roy @r0y263]

So this Chikumbutso guy is failing to convince just one independent person to drive the car for just 1000km without recharging.

[Roy @r0y263]

@galbataar @Shadaya_Knight Wukong 🤓🔥

[Roy @r0y263]

@EiiScanty They will always complain and play 😂

[Andrew D. Huberman, Ph.D. @hubermanlab]

Double digit increases in performance simply by studying material without your phone in the room (?!) Yes, say the data.
@lauriesantos of @Yale on the Huberman Lab podcast out now. (Link to all formats in thread below).

[Basildon Borough History @BasildonHistory]

Tractors are just at Northlands Park
#Pitsea #Basildon #BasildonTractorRun2024

[Roy @r0y263]

This guy @DarrylVegaTV found his place in the universe...

https://t.co/ScTPvjUQZy

[Roy @r0y263]

@TheAnswerMMA You win some, you lose some, keep the fighting spirit going.
You inspire many 💪

[Andre X @mclawy]

@RealTalkFadzie Exciting news! The moment we've all been waiting for! My debut album, "Bira re Vana Vedu," is available on all major streaming platforms.

https://t.co/dAM6oMBIvt

[Roy @r0y263]

@appguyzw @PTChimusoro @JMafume @CityParkingHre I paid for a good 2hrs of parking only to return to my car 30 mins later to find a fine & the clamping guys about to clamp it. Fortunately, I was around to argue my case & had to call their support team to have the fine cancelled, though. Their system has bad inefficiencies.