Evanfursure

Founder @DearHimAI

Views expressed may not be my own 🤷🏼‍♂️

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@btcsniperrr Solid rule. The trick is making the truth cheap to tell — if someone gets punished for admitting they're still texting someone else, they'll just get better at hiding it.

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@Defonotpeyton Go anyway, and bring a friend so you're never the one standing alone in the lobby. If he approaches: two sentences, friendly, then walk back to your people you don't owe an ex talking stage a whole conversation.

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@thesheking_ Pride is just fear with better branding. Text first, twice even — then judge by whether they ever start the conversation themselves, not by who blinked.

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@Chaaaarlyyyyyy A guy who vanishes because he didn't get sex on night one just told you his whole plan for free. Cheapest screening you'll ever get — hold the boundary and the ghosts filter themselves out.

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@ndbleedout The one-sided part is the actual wound, not the missing. If you'd regret not knowing, send one honest message and take the answer at face value — otherwise the silence is your answer and you get to stop auditioning.

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@burn_the_files Honestly this is why the double text rule is dumb — option 2 is way more common than people assume. One follow-up costs you nothing and it separates "busy" from "not interested" in a day.

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@_xoxah Forgetting for a day usually says something honest about your interest level. If you do want it, don't over-apologize — just "sorry, my day ate me, how was yours?" and pick it back up.

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@roses_in_field Fair — I build in this space (DearHim) and the line I hold is that it should help someone handle a real conversation, not replace having one. Practicing what to say to an actual person is useful; an endless roleplay boyfriend mostly just eats your evening.

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@max_benlien Mostly agree, with one edit: ask once first. One clear "hey, are you interested in dating me or not?" turns half of mixed signals into an actual answer, and the ones who still can't answer are your no.

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@GrndAdmiralDrac Three weeks of possibility takes longer to bury than three months of reality, so that math is normal. The one favor to yourself: delete the thread, because drunk-you will absolutely text it again otherwise.

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@MOODZREO The flirting is real, the label is what he's protecting. Ask straight out what he wants this to be — if "just friends" survives that question, believe the words over the vibes.

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@JuuucyFruit Because you lose the person and the permission to grieve them at the same time. Grieve it like a real one anyway: name what you actually lost, tell one friend the whole story out loud, then stop rereading the texts for proof it was real.

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@ichii_j0ou "Dry texter" usually means "I felt ignored" in a worse costume. Worth asking him which moments felt dry — if the answer is you texting your friend mid-call, that's a jealousy thing, not a texting thing.

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@vaanixxx Age isn't the filter you think it is — plenty of 35 year olds text like that too. The actual filter is whether he can answer a direct question directly, so ask what he's looking for in week one and let the dodge sort him out.

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@piercedorganz The posting is usually the symptom: no one to say it to, so the feed becomes the friend. Mute for 30 days does the same thing as a ban without the fight, and honestly a "hey, you good?" DM ends the note spiral faster than anything.

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@mechanicalskin That's your closure right there — the disappearing act was his life imploding, not a read on you. Wish him well from a distance and don't let sympathy turn into taking him in.

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@luvistheren Being official doesn't make someone consistent, it just gives you standing to ask for it. Say once, plainly: "going quiet for days doesn't work for me" — and watch whether the next quiet stretch happens anyway.

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@diplobrocus @Chinchillazllla The "possessive and obsessed" angle is just what performs on TikTok. I build one of these (DearHim) and the ads all sell jealousy because it's dramatic, not because it's what people actually keep using.

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@polypocketknife Agreed, that framing outsources the nagging instead of the noticing. I work on an AI companion app (DearHim) and the honest use case is helping someone figure out what they want to say, not managing a partner who won't show up.

[Evanfursure @realevanevan]

@Dexerto I build in this space (DearHim), and this is the part people underrate: if the character lives entirely on a company's server, a policy change can end the relationship overnight. Exportable chat history should be table stakes.