George

Done presidentin'.

[George @retired_bush]

@Thomasfraney A lot like when I had a job, actually.

[George @retired_bush]

Each president builds a library to commemorate his presidency. And yes, it has to be a library; they totally shot down my mini golf idea.

[George @retired_bush]

My memoir is almost done. It took a while to get the aircraft carrier to pop up right, but now you can pull a little tab and I wave my hand!

[George @retired_bush]

My new neighbors looked a little nervous when I told them my best friend is black, but I think they'll like Barney just fine.

[George @retired_bush]

It was the one where Goofus invades a sovereign nation and becomes mired in an age-old religious conflict. Heh heh, I love Goofus.

[George @retired_bush]

I should have been more thorough when I moved, I think I left my favorite Highlights magazine in the Oval Office bathroom.

[George @retired_bush]

Obama's speech was pretty good, but it'll make more sense once I get home and google a few of those words.

[George @retired_bush]

The secret service says I'm allowed to eat pretzels again.

[George @retired_bush]

Only two weeks left for presidentin'. I haven't been this depressed since I found out that the motorcade is neither a moat nor an arcade.

[George @retired_bush]

@darthvader You want to play golf some time?

[George @retired_bush]

After my last day, I'll finally have time to finish reading My Pet Goat.

[George @retired_bush]

@BarackObama You might want to let it air out in there for a while

[George @retired_bush]

Constitution? Nope, I pooped when I got up this morning.

[George @retired_bush]

People say Palin is like me in a skirt, but how would they know? I always close the curtains when I play lady dress-up.

[George @retired_bush]

I hate it when Dick cleans out my office, he always shreds the notes with my best doodles.

[George @retired_bush]

I was going to start writing my memoirs today, but Laura accidentally bought me the college-ruled paper instead of the regular.

[George @retired_bush]

I'm going to miss the Oval Office, this desk is perfect for building forts.