Shiny Fist-o

37(!). They/them. Ad Copywriter. Has Moxie (the beverage). Lover of genre fiction and rings. Let's not yuck anyone's yum.
Black Lives Matter.

[Vivian @suchnerve]

⚠️

[Rebecca Doodles @rebecca_doodles]

The non binary electrical cabinet.

[Papii🥤 @ammalusty]

formal apology to my parents for my behavior during the 2008 recession. if someone asked me to buy them a nintendo ds and an annual roblox membership rn i'd actually blow up

[Polly Pocketknife🌸🔪 @polypocketknife]

this is only cool because you can’t read any of the signs. in america this would just be a barrage of MCDONALDS SHELL NORDSTROM 7ELEVEN KFC TARGET ULTA CHIPOTLE MACYS CHEVRON WENDYS CVS TJ MAXX STARBUCKS AMPM OLD NAVY HOBBY LOBBY WALMART SEPHORA ARBYS GAP SINCLAIR TACO BELL KOHLS

[Christopher Kratovil @chris_kratovil]

It’s deeply odd to me that America is a far less 24/7 hour society today than it was 10, 20, or even 30 years ago. I vividly remember friends from the UK back in 1996 marveling at the fact that in the mid-sized Indiana town where I went college it was possible to buy groceries, clothing, a lawn mower, a snow blower, Lego sets, and bow hunting gear at 3 AM on any given Tuesday of the year. That was peak American Empire, and it’s long gone.

[Himbo Urbanist | FUND SEPTA 🚲🚇🏙️ @himbo_urbanist]

some people truly have never experienced the joy of a safe train / bus ride home after a night out and a few beers with good friends - no driving drunk required. Actual top 10 life experience

[Brian Callaci @brian_callaci]

We Americans are totally correct on this point. "Football" has nothing to do with kicking. It refers to a wide family of commoner games played *on foot* as opposed to the games of the aristocracy, played on horseback. Soccer, short for "association football" is merely one of them

[Terrible Maps @TerribleMaps]

Baja Colorado

[Scoob @Scoobydouchebag]

Having to meet with HR for calling pictures of my coworker's newborn "infantslop"

[Zaid Jilani @ZaidJilani]

“A family from Mexico arrives this morning legally has as much right to the American Dream as the direct descents of the Founding Fathers.”

Bob Dole accepting the Republican nomination for President in 1996.

[Daniel Galleghost 🎃👻 @BeanWalrus]

It's really funny that we're suddenly in the backwards future where, to promote your new He-Man movie, you have to go into the criterion closet and talk about Paolo Sorrentino films

[Peter Twinklage @PeterTwinklage]

pinkwashing is gauche & abrasive. it’s also a helluva lot better than the near silence we’ve seen from corporate American over the last 4 years or so. we can wince at the weird (cynical) promotional campaigns, or we can recognize they’re a result of MAGA losing the culture war

[Shiny Fist-o @ringfist]

"A-loo-min-ee-um" is delightful

[hoots hootman @PunishedHoots]

This week we should say which pronunciations we love. I love the way British people say "skeletal"

[Shiny Fist-o @ringfist]

@PaleBlueMomma @MadelaineLucyH I became friends with a woman who was not my type (physically).

Things were great, she moved up my friendship rankings, and about the time I considered her my best friend, suddenly I thought she was the sexiest woman alive.

[Shiny Fist-o @ringfist]

Are you... talking about telling jokes?

[NEET priest @serpentinedumb1]

People who enjoy lying for fun often overestimate their skill. The world's bartenders and taxi drivers are forced to nod and smile at people who think they're being quirky for doing high-school improv with themselves

[The Ginger Swindler @lilydsmith]

coworker asked me if ive been “seeing those hunter biden tweets” baby i can recite them. i pledge allegiance to them.

[globalchow @chow_global]

sociological fact about humans: notions we typically associate with masculinity - loyalty, courage, etc. - are not really predator virtues, they're virtues of pack animals (which is also why wolves not bears have them)

[The Frustrating Individual @MILFmassacre]

(In sex ed class) Yeah right, like we’ll ever use this stuff in the real world

[Shiny Fist-o @ringfist]

@nokaygirl It was "hedonic interests" that made me go "oh, you're a psycho. Got it."

[. @Randellena]

Listen, I'm not one to typically qrt the TSA unless I'm mocking them, but there's a story behind this tweet and I think we all deserve to hear it.