Robbie Dale

I tried wearing a straightjacket once but i couldn't really pull it off.

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

@Tesco can I get a refund on this ginger? Purchased yesterday, rotten inside. Unsafe to put in my Al fresco rainbow slaw

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

How come there is a Christmas Eve but not a Christmas Adam? Burn the matriarchy. #MeToo

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

@Lord_Sugar "Safari is about selling merchandise"

You're a real fun holiday aren't you?

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

@tobytarrant just so you know, Immortal Technique also samples 'Dream On' in his song Angels and Demons.

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

Does Lacazette mean; the tape player (feminine)? #FULARS

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

@brumsghostsigns very faint one in Bearwood?

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

@theholdsteady have you released a brand of miniature cookies in Portugal?

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

A black cat just crossed my path, followed me home, came in my living room and sat on my lap whilst we watched Peep Show. What's unlucky about that?

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

Why are campervans always white?

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

At night, Cody has started to play a game with his teddies that I used to play in Snobs where you look around and decide which creature you want to take to bed.

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

I don't agree with playing musical chairs with children because it's counter-intuitive. It sanctions the nutty ravers for being in the zone and rewards those pebbles who stand around shaking their arms.

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

Best player in the world? This Messi wouldn't get into the Iceland team. #ARGvICE

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

Who allowed Love Island to use Hans Zimmer's 'Time' for the voting off bit? (Disclaimer: switched over from football. Don't actually watch it, btchplz)

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

My book review on American Psycho by B.E.B. - it's like Charles Manson starred in an episode of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

@Harvinder_S_Gil Happy Baisakhi my Indian brother

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

Woody Allen is my spirit animal.

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

Coworker: So, what did you get up to at half term?
Acceptable answer: Nothing much, just chilled.
Truth: Watched 3 series of Go Jetters on CBeebies iPlayer

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

This year, I think I'm at that annoying Marxist age where I kinda want #TheWetBandits to rob the shit out of the rich-ass Mcalister's house just to redistribute capital throughout rust-belt Illinois. #HomeAlone

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

@tampalmerr Need a dealer sorted?

[Robbie Dale @robertodimadale]

#Twirlywoos teaching little babadook how to push and pull. But my man ain't gonna have any problem pulling when he's older #ladykiller