Hannah K

I’m decently sure I’m lost.

[Hannah K @runawayhannah]

@deltaozzimo This is….. literally anatomy. I learned this in 5th grade in the 90s. This is normal. It’s super important to learn about your anatomy and puberty. I’m not sure what the issue is.

[Hannah K @runawayhannah]

I just found out John Mulaney is pretty tall (6 feet) and I can’t figure out why I find that so surprising.

[Hannah K @runawayhannah]

@Apocalypse_Meow Alternative View: I do not accept cash at my restaurant due to the amount of bars that have been robbed with staff held at gunpoint or killed in East Atlanta. No cash on premise = safer for my staff. Less of a target.

[Hannah K @runawayhannah]

If I was a pop star who needed a revamp/resurgence I would roll heavy into releasing a late 90s techno/ early 2000s trance song.

[Hannah K @runawayhannah]

My millennial trauma is not ready for flare jeans to come back. These trends need to slow down.

[Hannah K @runawayhannah]

@cbenderatl @JoshGreen1234 Upstairs bar will be winterized when it opens next month, we’re going from loooong to tall!

[Hannah K @runawayhannah]

@Apocalypse_Meow @OdessaDeLaGarza “Hi beautiful!”
“Hey”
“Hey”
“Wyd”
“Wya”
“Hey”

[Hannah K @runawayhannah]

The best thing I heard today:

“Dave Grohl is just Keanu Reeves with a Chaotic Alignment.”

[TechnicallyRon (On all the platforms) @TechnicallyRon]

The sub story has everything. Billionaires. Logitech controllers. A stepson seeing Blink 182. Conversations about what is funny and what isn't. Rescue missions. The Titanic. Orcas.

[Hannah K @runawayhannah]

@dbrauer “A cartful of stuff, about $75 worth of items” Tell me you haven’t been to Target in a decade without telling me 😂😂😂

[thea 🦋 @theagwrites]

This is what the inside of my head looks like tbh

[Hannah K @runawayhannah]

Yesterday I had a woman ask me to discipline her 5 year old son, because he was not listening to her. When I told her that parenting HER CHILD was not something I, A BARTENDER AND STRANGER, was willing to do she wanted to speak to a manager. People are wild.

[Hannah K @runawayhannah]

Tonight a man didn’t want to order a beer by its name because it was ‘A gay name’ and the guy was ‘A MAN’. Y’all. There is so much to unpack there, but I think you should know the word he didn’t want to say: “Sunny.”

[Hannah K @runawayhannah]

A wild part of working in the service industry in the South is the amount of people who go full Karen for not providing a heater for their patio table while it is still over 70 degrees outside. I know we don’t do cold well here, but 73 degrees?!?

[Max @maxtmcc]

one thing I admire about Midwestern city naming conventions is their willingness to tell the French language that if you’re gonna include all those weird consonants in your words than you better believe they’re all gonna be pronounced

[Hannah K @runawayhannah]

I verbally complain to my dog every single night about the work of ‘shutting down my body’ (aka, shower, brushing my teeth, skincare routine, the ‘putting up the stools’ of hygiene, if you will) while I get ready for bed and I just tonight realized perhaps this is not normal.

[Hannah K @runawayhannah]

Preferred method no.1 is, obviously, in my sleep. And no.2 requires a stunning amount of flexibility and however much money it would take to get Adam Driver to reprise his role as Ben Solo for a brief private performance.

[Hannah K @runawayhannah]

In the last 4 hours I have swiftly come down with the worst case of food poisoning I have ever experienced. Unable to move from the bathroom floor. If this bad boy takes me out, then I will have achieved my no.3 preferred way to die: Death by Pizza.

[Hannah K @runawayhannah]

Things I HAVE to do tomorrow: not shit. Things I SHOULD do tomorrow: 7,000 individual tasks. Guess which side I’m erring on. Go ahead. Guess.

[Hannah K @runawayhannah]

A truly underrated feeling is panicking that you have stayed up too late, but then realizing you have zero obligations the next day.