Ryan Patrick Ries

Not The Ryan Ries from the "Whosoevers"

[Ryan Patrick Ries @RyanRies]

Toothpaste commercials are so Racist.

[Ryan Patrick Ries @RyanRies]

"Pandas are the idiots of bears." -Morgan Nicole Smith

[Ryan Patrick Ries @RyanRies]

Here's a post just for twitter. #JustforTwitter

[Ryan Patrick Ries @RyanRies]

Customer- "There's ice on the roads." Me- "Great, now I get to look forward to all the Facebook posts about it."

[Ryan Patrick Ries @RyanRies]

yo @netflix, you should do the spin off from "The Office" of Schrute Farms. It would be awesome. Thank you

[Ryan Patrick Ries @RyanRies]

Trump doesn't wanna live in the White House b/c he knows his coke dealer will always be frisked and then no coke for Donald #SirSniffsAlot

[Ryan Patrick Ries @RyanRies]

I hope @AlecBaldwin will continue to do @realDonaldTrump impressions and @SNL. Oh and Donald, Laughing at yourself makes you look better

[Ryan Patrick Ries @RyanRies]

RIP Gene Wilder. I will remember your work in "Blazing Saddles" #RIPGeneWilder

[Ryan Patrick Ries @RyanRies]

"I find that life is like..." now finish the sentence.

[Ryan Patrick Ries @RyanRies]

Don't you just hate it when you're in the middle of typing out something on Fb, then you go, "Ah no one cares." #Delete

[Ryan Patrick Ries @RyanRies]

Chicago folks are saying that St. Louis fans have no class and then continue to make fun of us for not having a Stanley Cup. #ChicagoNoClass

[Ryan Patrick Ries @RyanRies]

So sorry to hear about your loss @pattonoswalt https://t.co/QcVXtklYXI

[The Hollywood Reporter @THR]

Michelle McNamara, Writer and Wife of Patton Oswalt, Dies at 46 https://t.co/ILll2NAqCe

[Ryan Patrick Ries @RyanRies]

https://t.co/o2nirIr7FS In case you had questions. His plan can and will work. #EducateYourselves

[Ryan Patrick Ries @RyanRies]

Get em Blues booo you Blackhawks

[Ryan Patrick Ries @RyanRies]

Go Blues!!!!!! keep going @StLouisBlues rule

[Ryan Patrick Ries @RyanRies]

so what is his IQ anyway https://t.co/5CHiV6cWpN

[John Goodman @jgoodman81]

Lol https://t.co/EkaXsHp0qE

[Ryan Patrick Ries @RyanRies]

I make her smile when I feel down b/c her smile makes me smile #RelationshipGoals

[dose. @dose]

16 celebrity face swaps you'll literally never be able to unsee. https://t.co/qtmybJnFBv

[Ryan Patrick Ries @RyanRies]

Unless that Republican is @realDonaldTrump, then I will see what jobs they offer in Canada #NoVotesforAnyone

[Ryan Patrick Ries @RyanRies]

@HillaryClinton If she wins I will definitely vote republican. #NoVotesforyou