person

little piece of work

[person @saltandvice]

Office printers are like people. Sometimes they just want you to open all their doors and acknowledge what's inside before they'll give you what you want. #deepthoughts #officelife

[person @saltandvice]

@marwilliamson You're not helping

[person @saltandvice]

Time to be a mongoose ladies.
#SmashThePatriarchy

[person @saltandvice]

My parents didn't believe me when I told them. I got spanked for ripping my dress, instead. #WhyIDidntReport

[person @saltandvice]

@NowhereBlander But that's just like, his opinion, man.

[person @saltandvice]

THEY'RE BACK!!! @kitten_academy #santaponies #Clarice #CreepyReindeer

[person @saltandvice]

Who the fuck waits sixteen years to respond to a birthday email? #ithappenedtome #youcangofuckyourself #newlifewhodis

[person @saltandvice]

@agueros_henry @5YND1C @NowhereBlander Ay bendito.... lo que debe doler ser tan necio.

[person @saltandvice]

To the lady that just asked me, horrified, why I'm playing "Mexican music" in Kentucky.... Bob Marley and I would like you to go fuck yourself.
#wypipo #DearCustomer

[person @saltandvice]

@NowhereBlander Yeah. She was truly disgusted and followed up by saying that we works know that Kentucky means you play bluegrass. Fuck everyone.

[person @saltandvice]

Clariiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS Thank you @kitten_academy! #foundher #getthatwaffle #santapony

[person @saltandvice]

THIS. Please? #bringthemhome #ilovesantaponies @kitten_academy https://t.co/9Gf8Ig5vrv

[The Gospel According to St. Brandon @NowhereBlander]

I'm irrationally bummed that I haven't seen the @kitten_academy reindeer in a few days.

[person @saltandvice]

Want to figure out who your #RealFriends are? Have a parent die and see where your #chosenfamily goes. #orphanedadult #whatever

[Rudy Bouma 🧑‍💻🎦 📺 @rudybouma]

The Polish historian & political scientist Jerzy Targalski remained completely unruffled during our interview when this happened👇🤨🤷‍♂️

[person @saltandvice]

24 hours without sleep makes you loooOOOooOOoOOpy

[person @saltandvice]

Since I'm not living near the ocean at the moment, nor do I own a bathtub, coming home from vacation is always a little sad. Even if there's no ocean, at least I can soak and pretend to be wherever it is I belong. #FirstWorldProblems #elcuerpopideplaya

[The Gospel According to St. Brandon @NowhereBlander]

Yo no soy un abogado de ciudad grande, pero creo que Aaron Schlossberg es un huelebicho. #IllSpeakWhateverLanguageIWant

[person @saltandvice]

"The bus demands a sacrifice." #laughedsohardIpeedalittle #choking #sendhelp