Sam

You boys know how to shovel coal?

[timmygami eyes @deliclit]

Paul mescal is 28??????? Girl……get that retinol

[stephen Gutteridge @StotheGridge]

How did the other 80% get on?

[FIN. @TebiRex]

I just saw someone call us “paddystinians” as an insult but I actually kinda like it

[Aidan James @mcandidate]

hope your mum enjoys her retirement

[Susie Dent @susie_dent]

Word of the day is ‘recrudescence’ (17th century): the return of something terrible after a time of reprieve.

[the idiot tax @TheIdiotTax]

Hell of a twist here.

[Joanna Cannon @JoannaCannon]

There’s a lad cleaning next door’s windows. He has earphones in. Every few minutes he shouts

THE WHOLE OF THE MOON!!!

at the top of his actual voice. I am watching him, in complete silence, and honestly it’s mesmerising 😂

[Fiona Small @FionaSmall]

Happy first anniversary to the news report about a potential cosmic event that was actually a hole dug on the beach by a bunch of lads

[Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes]

LIVING WITH A DOG IS 90% FOLLOWING EACH OTHER AROUND, WATCHING EACH OTHER GO POTTY, AND WONDERING WHAT THE OTHER HAS IN THEIR MOUTH.

[Áine 🚀✨ @AnnieTook]

I heard that Enoch Burke is back at Wilson’s Hospital School to help the kids with weather forecast 🥰

[Andrew Donaldson @four4thefire]

Larry Tesler, inventor of the cut, copy and paste commands, dies at 74.

[Matthew @regionalthicko]

Me when I spy a delicious pie cooling on a windowsill

[AVERAGEJOE33 @AVERAGEJOE33]

His arse must be in a terrible state

[Gallivanting With Words out Oct 30th @irishmammies]

They'll all be wanting pommel horses for Christmas now. Anyone giving lessons will make a fortune.