Samuel Edward

the best friend you never wanted

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

Literally was singing praises of @airbnb hosting @airbnbhelp up until 2 weeks ago when my apartment was burglarized and destroyed and it’s been radio silence.

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

@Airbnb @AirbnbHelp my apartment was vandalized and burglarized by a guest nearly 2 weeks ago and I still have not been able to get a hold anyone on your actual team to assist me with the fallout from this

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

Hey @AppleMusic seeing as #MichaelJackson ‘s whole discography is still available on iTunes, can we at least get @PWRBTTMBAND ‘s 2nd album?

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

Don't rhybknow I am the epicenter of a rather large 4chan conspiracy scandal ATM?

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

No one ever wants to get brunch anymore.

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

Can we all agree that alfalfa sprouts have no business being in a sandwich

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

Haven't we been through enough this year? Can't we just forgo the whole ugly Christmas sweater thing?

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

@Uber_Support Jk it was in my junk mail sorry :/

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

@Uber_Support sent this form in twice yesterday ... And still haven't heard anything back from your team. Really need my phone today :(

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

@Uber_Support I left my phone in a car and driver is saying I must come to him (very far) or pay for his cab to me. Is this normal?

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

My type is really tall guys at bars that don't want to talk to me

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

Twenty years later and I'm still in love with Ryan Phillipe

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

Still would hit it tho

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

Just saw Jason hoppy on the 2 train, in a cheap ass looking suit, guess that settlement wasn't too good. #rhony

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

That felt really good. Thank you Twitter.

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

See the shirts. They are dreadful

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

And I'm just ignoring them now, but I just wanna be petty so bad. It would be so easy. This person is the dregs of the earth. You should

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

"To quote Taylor swift, see you in court" it just her up for about two whole muted before the DMs started pouring in again.

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

I had to use smaller words though bc she's a trump supporter. Well of course she's a dog and goes on for a while longer before I finally say

[Samuel Edward @samueledward]

And that she's "sure I didn't know" despite her comments on my posts for months. So I nicely explain why her trademark is erroneous