sav

[sav @savab22]

Dad: "if they put a reproductive sterilizer in Mountain Dew, it would probably raise America's average IQ" *dad sips his large Mountain Dew*

[Jerrica @jerricasays_]

They arrested thousands of people to avoid arresting four.

Let that sink in.

[sav @savab22]

@AndreStates1 Did you just look in the mirror again?

[sav @savab22]

@AndreStates1 How???

[sav @savab22]

@AndreStates1 We tried! Someone is just too cool...

[sav @savab22]

@hank_moody_jr Let me know how it goes. This is the 2nd or 3rd time I've gotten this sad pile of noodles and I'm still in denial they switched it for good

[sav @savab22]

@hank_moody_jr I KNOW. And they ruined it. They changed the pasta and barely give an sauce on there at all. It was like dry, slightly cheesy noodles

[sav @savab22]

WHAT DID SAUCE DO TO THEIR MAC'N CHEESE??! I'm not okay.

[sav @savab22]

"I kinda wanted to throw up on her and be like 'whoops'" -@AndreStates1 rn

[sav @savab22]

@AndreStates1 Pretty sure 🙃 it's not terrible, but uncomfortable for sure

[sav @savab22]

@AndreStates1 ... It's a real thing 😭😂

[sav @savab22]

@brownboymobn YES!! Be careful out there

[sav @savab22]

I'm getting old and my body is falling apart

[sav @savab22]

@AndreStates1 THIS IS SPARTA

[sav @savab22]

#DierksWRTempe

[sav @savab22]

I'm so glad that my grandma can describe the sunset for over 10 minutes... Because, ya know, seeing it with my own eyes is just not enough

[sav @savab22]

It bothers me when tan people talk about how they're pale... If you think you're pale what do you think I am? Wait... CAN YOU EVEN SEE ME?

[sav @savab22]

For all people that have dogs, can we be friends? I'm not saying I'm using you for your dog, but actually, that's exactly what I'm saying

[Andre States @AndreStates1]

I think I'm hilarious and that's all that matters

[sav @savab22]

BEWARE: goats will lure you into thinking they want to b pet. This is all a ploy to eat your maps. Don't fall for it