The Savsquatch

huff my shorts

[Scott LaFoy @wslafoy]

Celebrating the 250th with Dunkin's refreshing new canopic jar

[Kameron “KY” Yung , DDS @DaveFreese6]

A guy at the pro shop today said that his “swamp ass is so bad he was hydroplaning on the toilet seat”. Never heard that one before. May be adding it to the bag.

[bailey @Baileymoon15]

reacting to my doordashed taco bell order the way lucille bluth reacts to gene parmesan

[QC @QiaochuYuan]

from the point of view of a cat, by karel čapek

[Clara @girl_syndrome]

Men are always friends with some guy you couldn’t even imagine

[꧁༒☬ 𝔾𝕒𝕓𝕣𝕚𝕖𝕝 ☬༒꧂ @Gabbrielxzn]

Telemarketer: hello, am I speaking to the head of the household?

Me, handing the phone to my cat: It's for you.

[aley @gildedsprings]

“le he preguntando a chatgpt”

si? bueno yo lo he preguntado a Ra dios del sol creador de la vida y representante de la luz y el orden

y ha dicho que 𓂀𓋹𓁈𓃠𓆃☥𓅓𓆣

[Books Behind Borders @MHTruthUltra]

They will NOT make a billionaire contribute to the basic needs of the community BUT they will make the whole community bear the electrical, water, and building costs of a data center owned by a billionaire.

[*leslie @LEZB0B0MB]

robert eggers' muse is a 70 year old man from wisconsin and i think that's iconic

[Today In History @historigins]

Published in The Baltimore Sun, Maryland (1924)

[rune sword @runesword1]

blood soaked owl always in peripheral vision. gets slightly closer every year on my birthday. good omen?

[𝒢𝒾𝓁𝒷ℯ𝓇𝓉 @AbakpaJob]

"your cat will eat you when you die" yeah but he shows infinite grace by making no attempt in the meantime. leave him alone

[kiesha @kiesha9i]

Me, talking to my cat: idk | just feel really sad lately
My cat: hey buddy, you know what would cheer you up?
Me: please don't show me your butthole
My cat, already turned around: this is MY butthole

[Raven Blackrose @byte4554]

Im da king of da restaraunt

[𝓐 ⭑ @ayojoestar]

Me: gets up briefly in the night due to insomnia
My cat: father this is amazing, I have been saying for YEARS that we should have breakfast at 3:30

[SpideyDoesStuff @SpideyDoeStuff]

Mamdani at night