schmackedafee

NBA champion. Friday enthusiast. Semi professional paint baller

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

Restaurant hostess: follow me, your tables ready.
Me: what are you , crazy? I’m not following you anywhere

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

When she hears I haven’t pissed my bed or in one of my drawers in weeks

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

@mydickfloat Caterpillar

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

I’m the Denver broncos Russell Wilson of talking to females

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

No takers I see

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

Joe claims to be a stillers fan and doesn’t know who mewelde Moore is. Help me out guys

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

@EmCream13 The other billion didn’t even show me the time of day. #appreciateyoutho

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

If I had a dollar for every girl that didn’t talk to me tonight, I could buy Africa

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

@hum_beb can’t believe we have a Sunday tomorrow. Books are shaking. Early like I like is Steelers +100 ml against the bye week. Can’t lose

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

@hum_beb Tailing

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

@hum_beb what are you liking tomorrow? Rents due

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

@mydickfloat what’s it gonna take for jettas

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

@hum_beb what’s going through your mind right now about the fighting Irish

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

POV: The females have arrived

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

Feeling like one of those nights where I piss in a place I’m simply not supposed to piss

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

To that girl I’ll never say a word to

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

Bartender with the huge cans asked me what I want and I went mitch McConnell. I’ll get em next time around #staytuned

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

@hum_beb No Steelers players. You’re good as burnt toast brother

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

@TaybeezyRips Live fast die fast

[schmackedafee @schmacafee]

About that time of the night I turn into Mitch McConnell at a crowded bar