Lisa Bronson

[Lisa Bronson @scissorhands85]

@saraheenglish let's do it!!!

[WorkingBarbie @WorkingBarbie]

How about I pour you a tall glass of chateau d'hellup?

[Laclede Cab @LacledeCab]

That’s a wrap! Thanks to @briancjenglish and @scissorhands85 for helping with the commercial!

[WorkingBarbie @WorkingBarbie]

The best way to show me that you know nothing about me is to invite me to go camping

[judgmental gay @jdgmntlgay]

Have this thing where I like to run away from my problems and to the mall.

[judgmental gay @jdgmntlgay]

Find your inner Beyoncé. Exhale Michelle, Inhale Beyoncé.

[judgmental gay @jdgmntlgay]

Do I need food or do I need clothes more?

[judgmental gay @jdgmntlgay]

do you ever stalk your friend's profile, then her friend's profile, then her friend's friend's profile, and end up in another dimension?

[Lisa Bronson @scissorhands85]

@pibbylotter @projoeiii Is that a joke?!?!?

[judgmental gay @jdgmntlgay]

My entire life is a cheat day to eat whatever.

[Lisa Bronson @scissorhands85]

@KidsRN2011 @projoeiii oh you mean the younger,prettier,girlfriend with tons of personality?!Yeah youre right nothing to be jealous of!!

[Lisa Bronson @scissorhands85]

@projoeiii Nothing spells "grown up" better than a jealous-social media-stalking ex!!!

[Joe Kennedy @projoeiii]

You're so vain. You probably think this tweet is about you.

[Lisa Bronson @scissorhands85]

@projoeiii @causewereguys and the crazy just gets CRAZIER....!!

[Wolf Pack Alan @WolfpackAlan]

Alcohol is like the liquid version of Photoshop.

[judgmental gay @jdgmntlgay]

I don't know about you, but the American dream to me is owning a set of Louis Vuitton luggage by the age of 21. I'm pretty ambitious.

[judgmental gay @jdgmntlgay]

Primary life goal: Beyonce
Secondary life goal: a mermaid

[judgmental gay @jdgmntlgay]

Amanda Bynes said Zac Efron is not cute. Only Jesus can help her now.

[judgmental gay @jdgmntlgay]

*walks into a plastic surgeon's office* *shows a picture of beyonce*

[judgmental gay @jdgmntlgay]

give me coffee or give me a coffin.