Scorpius Ryan

I wish I was a cat, but regrettably I'm an incredibly handsome boy. he/him/his

[Scorpius Ryan @scorpiusryan21]

The similarities between the prejudices of the dad in the Sugar We’re Going Down vid & King Harold in Shrek 2 towards their daughters’ love interests while simultaneously withholding their own hypocritical secrets of their own identities is truly unparalleled in modern culture.

[Scorpius Ryan @scorpiusryan21]

@elysamolly I am just seeing this now but I appreciate the love!!

[Scorpius Ryan @scorpiusryan21]

I went to a Catholic High School and one time a teacher threw a stapler at a student

[helena riley @freshhel]

Animals in the zoo should get a prom

[lebron james holzhauer @glaivemaster69]

grave digger is a beautiful name for a girl

[Nathan Fretz ☂️ @nmfretz]

@scorpiusryan21 https://t.co/65I7VWkXKy

[ret @rad_milk]

“it started out with a kiss, how did it end up like this?” -jesus on the cross after being betrayed by judas’ kiss

[Scorpius Ryan @scorpiusryan21]

Step 1: Be featured on Duke Men’s Basketball IG story for ESPN
Step 2: ?????
Step 3: Profit
Step 4: Retire

[Scorpius Ryan @scorpiusryan21]

In Durham, North Carolina talking about Today’s TMJ4 John Malan

[madeline @ManwallLinemade]

I'm sorry ma'am but that's yassified information

[Scorpius Ryan @scorpiusryan21]

@thejoeyhiphop “Middle”, but shorter

[Scorpius Ryan @scorpiusryan21]

@GoodPoliticGuy William Henry Harrison! He died 31 days into his presidency

[Hoops @Hoopss]

A rare picture of Kawhi smiling, RT for good luck.

[Scorpius Ryan @scorpiusryan21]

@ManwallLinemade An even crazier time to be named Fezco

[Scorpius Ryan @scorpiusryan21]

Dude over my shoulder at the bar asking why im watching Bucks Finals highlights as if it warrants an explanation

[Scorpius Ryan @scorpiusryan21]

@kaela_ryan You got it!

[Scorpius Ryan @scorpiusryan21]

Save it and everyone will receive a vial of my Resses milk collection on my wedding day

[Reese's Puffs @reesespuffs]

I gotta ask…what do y’all do with the leftover cereal milk?
A. Drink it
B. Toss it

[Ron Iver @ronnui_]

I love bands that are also body parts. The Shins, The Head and the Heart, Chumbawumba I have to presume

[Scorpius Ryan @scorpiusryan21]

@ghostface763 @dank_bagel Hopping on a plane meow