sean

kangaroos can't jump backwards

[turd @goonageddon]

my broke buddy got twins on the way and he hit a $400 parlay the other night and ordered a parrot online

[sweetwolf @switch_n_smirk]

when u are a leg-bouncer and someone asks u to stop its like they're asking you to stop your own heart

[Neil Bahadur @NeilBahadur]

Halloween I think is actually a very cool day but the vibe is totally off this year

[carter hambley @carterhambley]

you can tell a person’s in a very dark place when a fortune cookie means a lot to them

[Thomas White @len0killer]

Bro you gotta try this high protein Caesar salad cold brew air fryer overnight oats recipe I found on Instagram

[kelbin @pissboymcgee]

This is what my unfolded laundry is doing to me right now. I need help

[diablo @starboydiablo]

My phone is on Do Not Disturb because I am disturbed enough as it is.

[hope hopes hoping @hopes_revenge]

you can tell when someone’s soul has been disfigured by screentime

[gatsu @0xgats]

by age 30 you should have a glock in your rari

[Yunie ૮ ․ ․ ྀིა @Hyeyunie]

Morning wood.. No . I'm mourning what would have been

[very baller cash money normal sane person @normal_ballerz]

admiring your autism

[v. @sweetoblivions]

everyday i open this app and this is all i can think about

[metaphor man @shitbiscuit]

I’m Johnny Knoxville and this is trusting a woman with my heart

[sean @seandurs]

The media today

[herman milly rock @Eyoyism]

iran, please do not miss

[Gordon Gekko @GordonGekko420]

If you use a Mac you don’t have a real job

[tia ★ @tiadeeznuts]

i'm not even doomscrolling anymore i'm just regular scrolling and everything's doomed