Sell Side Sponge

M&A IB Analyst // 3am fixes and selling sixes // a place to vent when my associate “smells capacity”

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

Spent 20 mins last night editing a PowerPoint slide that my MD “desperately needed asap” whilst the girl I was on a date with silently sipped her cocktail and looked out the window…
and somehow I’m surprised that she doesn’t want to go out again ???

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

Nah my flight’s been delayed so badly they’ve started giving tours of the cockpit lmao

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

@HighyieldHarry Yeah definitely - didn’t buy a particularly expensive pair but lowkey am sleeping better and eyes look visibly less tired/ bloodshot

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

Intern 7 days in making fun of my hair (or lack thereof)…guess who’s going to organise my 60,000 page VDR next week😊

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

When management sends you back the model with their inputs

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

I give it 1 year until Matt Damon is cast as the guy lost on this submersible, with Tom Hanks in charge of the search operation

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

When you get to the end of a long ass week, motivated only by your Saturday plans

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

@LFGCapitalLLC You can’t make a Tomlette without a breaking a few Gregs

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

@NoCapCapitalLLC My intern said he will absolutely return this by COB, so we can expect an answer in a few days time - will keep you in the loop

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

Me when I realise I’ve hit 1k followers

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

GF asked
“Is this what normal couples feel like”

after I finished work early-ish and got to hers at ~10pm last night…

Fair to say I’ve set the bar pretty damn low at this point

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

@LBOVinny I hope not, would not wish mine on anyone…

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

Another day, another email drafted for my associate who sends it out word-for-word with the deliverable attached, despite not doing any work or review on it

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

Long live King Charles III

And may all coronation weekends be free of pls fix emails

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

When are you getting off work tonight?

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

@TwoFaceCapital

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

Analysts when they negotiate a slightly better VDR quote for their client

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

@NYFBroker Agreed, but equally want Koepka to drop some shots otherwise Sunday could potentially be a bit boring…

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

Me after watching my 10/10 tweet flop

[Sell Side Sponge @SellSideSponge]

In my CIM drafting era 💅