Stefan Keydel

'Now that you've found another key,
What are you going to play?'

[The Green Dragon Tavern @greendragonhq]

Why be a red state when you could be a blue state?

Vote blue 2026, save your state.

States with highest Murder Rates
🔴 Louisiana : 16.8
🔴 Mississippi : 15.4
🔴 Alabama : 12.2
🔴 Missouri : 11.8
🔴 South Carolina : 10.5

States with the lowest Murder Rates
🔴 Utah : 2.2
🔵 Rhode Island : 2.0
🔵 Maine : 1.7
🔵 Vermont : 1.5
🔵 New Hampshire : 1.1

Bottom 5 public school systems (based on test scores)
🔴 Alaska
🔴 Louisiana
🔴 Arizona
🔴 Oklahoma
🔵 New Mexico

Top 5 public school systems (based on test scores)
🔵 New Jersey
🔵 Massachusetts
🔵 Connecticut
🔵 Vermont
🔵 Minnesota

States with the lowest life expectancy in years
🔴 Mississippi : 70.9
🔴 West Virginia 71.0
🔴 Alabama 72.0
🔴 Louisiana 72.2
🔴 Kentucky 73.5

States with the longest life expectancy in years
🔵 Hawaii : 79.9
🔵 Massachusetts : 79.6
🔵 Connecticut : 79.2
🔵 New Jersey : 79.0
🔵 New York : 79

States with the highest infant mortality rates
🔴 Mississippi : 9.11
🔴 Arkansas : 8.59
🔵 Delaware : 8.07
🔴 Lousiana 7.65
🔴 West Virginia : 7.47

States with the lowest infant mortality rates
🔴 North Dakota: 3.29
🔵 Massachusetts : 3.31
🔵 New Jersey : 3.61
🔵 New Hampshire : 3.66
🔵 California : 3.95

States most reliant on the federal government (per dollar)
🔴 Alaska : $2.36 per $1 in taxes paid
🔴 Kentucky: $3.35 per $1 in taxes paid
🔴 West Virginia : $2.72 per $1 in taxes paid
🔴 Mississippi : $2.34 per $1 in taxes paid
🔴 South Carolina : $3.42 per $1 in taxes paid

States least reliant on the federal government (per dollar)
🔵 New Jersey : $0.35 per $1 in taxes paid
🔵 California : $0.50 per $1 in taxes paid
🔵 Minnesota : $0.58 per $1 in taxes paid
🔵 Massachusetts : $0.41 per $1 in taxes paid
🔵 Illinois : $0.60 per $1 in taxes paid

States with the most domestic violence arrests
🔴 Nevada
🔴 Oklahoma
🔴 Missouri
🔴 Kentucky
🔴 Florida

States with the lowest domestic violence arrests per capita
🔴 North Dakota
🔵 New York
🔵 Rhode Island
🔵 Vermont
🔵 Massachusetts

Lowest GDP per capita
🔴 Mississippi : $53,061
🔴 Arkansas $60,276
🔴 West Virginia $60,783
🔴 South Carolina $61,616
🔴 Alabama $65,889

Highest GDP per capita
🔵 New York : $117,332
🔵 Massachusetts : $110,551
🔵 Washington : $108,468
🔵 California : $104,481
🔵 Connecticut : $99,035

States with the highest incarceration rates
🔴 Louisiana : 775
🔴 Mississippi : 717
🔴 Arkansas : 614
🔴 Oklahoma : 598
🔴 Texas : 563

States with the lowest incarceration rates
🔵 Massachusetts : 116
🔵 Maine : 130
🔵 Rhode Island : 152
🔵 Vermont : 153
🔵 New Hampshire : 165

highest obesity rates
🔴 West Virginia : 41.2%
🔴 Mississippi : 40.1%
🔴 Arkansas : 40.0%
🔴 Lousiana : 39.9%
🔴 Alabama : 39.3%

lowest obesity rates
🔵 District of Columbia : 23.5%
🔵 Colorado : 24.9%
🔵 Hawaii : 26.1%
🔵 Massachusetts : 27.4%
🔵 California : 27.4%

States with the worst public transportation:
🔴 Mississippi
🔴 Nebraska
🔴 Wyoming
🔴 North Dakota
🔴 Alaska

States with the best public transportation
🔵 New York
🔵 Massachusetts
🔵 Washington
🔵 New Jersey
🔵 Illinois

States with the lowest college graduation rates
🔵 New Mexico
🔴 Nevada
🔴 Idaho
🔴 Oklahoma
🔴 Alaska

States with the highest college graduation rates
🔵 Massachusetts
🔵 New Jersey
🔵 Connecticut
🔵 New Hampshire
🔴 Virginia

highest sex crime rate
🔴 Alaska : 118.4 per 100k
🔴 South Dakota : 72.6 per 100k
🔴 Nevada : 70.2 per 100k
🔴 Arkansas : 52.0 per 100k
🔵 Michigan 72.4 per 100k

lowest sex crime rate
🔵 New Jersey : 15.1 per 100k
🔵 Connecticut: 18.2 per 100k
🔵 New Hampshire : 19 per 100k
🔵 Maine : 21.3 per 100k
🔵 New York : 22.7

most teen pregnancy
🔴 Mississippi : 26.4
🔴 Arkansas : 24.5
🔴 Louisiana : 23.8
🔴 Oklahoma : 22.9
🔴 Alabama : 22.0

lowest amount of teen pregnancy
🔵 Massachusetts : 6.1
🔵 New Hampshire : 6.6
🔵 Connecticut : 7.6
🔵 Vermont : 7.8
🔵 New Jersey : 8.3

[Stefan Keydel @sfkeydel]

@elonmusk Your move.

[Stefan Keydel @sfkeydel]

@waitbutwhy Again, I ask you: check X for the responses of folks on the right to the murder of Melissa Hortman and the attempted murder of Paul Pelosi. Guess it won’t fit your narrative.

[Stefan Keydel @sfkeydel]

@waitbutwhy Why don’t you back and see what the reactions were to the following:

[Stefan Keydel @sfkeydel]

@joshua_becker Just saw your post from October 28th.

How’s the nonstop shitshow working out for you and the rest of the folks you invoked in the post?

[Stefan Keydel @sfkeydel]

@daringfireball If you sign up for Nomorobo in the app, it’s $29.99/year, whereas with the Daring Fireball promotion, it’s $45/year.

[Stefan Keydel @sfkeydel]

@moody_amp They moved our show up to 7:30 from 8pm, and yet here we are at 8:30 still waiting.

[Stefan Keydel @sfkeydel]

Trump-Palmer

[Stefan Keydel @sfkeydel]

Ever wanted to know what a guy who’s just been castrated looks like?

[Stefan Keydel @sfkeydel]

😱

[Stefan Keydel @sfkeydel]

@ElectNed @mattmfm Fatty Arbuckle, except with tiny hands.

[Stefan Keydel @sfkeydel]

@riesi041 Ever heard of a trend line?

[Stefan Keydel @sfkeydel]

@ThorChiggins @gruber How many abortions do you reckon Donald Trump has paid for over the years, Oh Mighty Thor?

[David Isaacson @writesaacson]

THREAD: I am sure Rachel Scott (@rachelvscott), Harris Faulkner (@HARRISFAULKNER) & Kadia Goba (@kadiagoba) don’t need my help coming up w/ tough questions to ask when Trump appears at #NABJ24. BUT here are 5 queries I’d love to hear him answer in front of @NABJ members. (1/13)

[Stefan Keydel @sfkeydel]

@DomenicoNPR
On the NPR Politics Podcast, you asserted that the DEI angle is ‘difficult’ for the GOP. How so? Is it difficult because it has become complicated for them to make racist and misogynist attacks on Harris?
Doesn’t seem ‘difficult’ to me. Just don’t do it.

[Stefan Keydel @sfkeydel]

@AskTSA What in the hell is going on at AUS right now?! One line for the entire airport??

[Stefan Keydel @sfkeydel]

@AUStinAirport Only one screening area open and no Pre-Check? Fuck you, AUS.

[Stefan Keydel @sfkeydel]

@matthewmaddock @petehoekstra Wow, such a dumbass.

[Stefan Keydel @sfkeydel]

@TheAtlantic @ibogost All you need to know:
‘The original Macintosh was only marginally useful, and the first iPhone didn’t do that much.’

[Stefan Keydel @sfkeydel]

@migold See how easy, Michael?

“Trump calls political enemies ‘vermin,’ echoing dictators Hitler, Mussolini”

Schooled by WaPo.