HellboyS.Funkenstein

I’m Hellboy Shibboleth Funkenstein. You're only going to read this once, if that, so fuck it.

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

@USFLBreakers i feel like dave the wave is going to give me a hard sell on a timeshare opportunity. did i mention that i might take him up on it

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

@steven53528908 @CDCgov i do, too. and i agree. most people DO'T read much at all.

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

@pattonoswalt sounds like a lost episode of joanie loves chachi where she kicks him in the crotch

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

@rmojomojito1 worst coachella lineup ever

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

@DoYouEvenLif it is fascinating in that i both understand it instantly and am also trying to wrap my head around it

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

@DGough94 did something new happen or is this in reference to his hypocrisy surrounding the anthem and black lives mattering?

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

@RealLucyLawless @StoneFaceBuster @ksorbs keep on slaying, warrior queen

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

congratulations, you are still in the running towards becoming america's next amy cooper. #lisaalexander #cancelkarens

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

@MikeBloomberg @Mike2020 @realDonaldTrump your team sucks balls. specifically meatballs that look like you. #MeatballMike

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

@WIPMiddayShow thanks for taking my call earlier. here's the ideal jingle:

https://t.co/gvjJxx7Qxs

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

and you're just a shitty @AnnCoulter

[Tomi Lahren @TomiLahren]

If you traipse your kid 2,000 miles in dangerous conditions you're not only a criminal, you're a shitty parent.

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

@wokkax3 i fucking hate twitter but a friend put this in their ig story and it was so wonderful that i had to login just to tell you.

also: i fucking hate twitter

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

the problem with people like @philipaklein is that they really and truly believe that they're the smartest person in any room they enter. that's a level of blissful ignorance to which no one should aspire

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

@CanWePhixItMLB @jojothejet6 great stuff. i appreciate the time and insight. didn't even know about jojo. i'll be keeping an eye out for him.

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

@SubversiveBlog and at least cher's song had the benefit of having a melody

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

can't wait to see where SBUX opens on the @Nasdaq on monday

#BoycottStarbucks #DoBetter #NoMoreWeakAssCorporateApologies

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

zuckerberg: i'm so, so sorry. i'm so sorry, you don't even know how sorry i am

starbucks: you wanna see sorry? hold my coffee

#BoycottStarbucks #DoBetter #NoMoreWeakAssCorporateApologies

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

hey @PhillyPolice, are your officers trained in conflict resolution and de-escalation techniques? if not, why not? if so, why are they so bad at it? is lack of common sense a prerequisite for joining the force? #BoycottStarbucks #DoBetter

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

kinda surprised that none of the performances tonight were feat. pitbull #GRAMMYs

[HellboyS.Funkenstein @shibbyfunk]

@JohnPersichilli voting out his enablers and sycophants. we need to push for candidates who will work to get money out of politics. we also need instant runoff voting, term limits for congress and SCOTUS, and make it difficult for the president to dismantle govt agencies from the top down